Sweet Dreams Or Beautiful Nightmares

8

🎶Undecided x Chris Brown🎶

But I'm undecided...excited.....ignited and I don't wanna feel the way I do, but I like it.

March 5th 2020

AB, Khimaya and I walked into their apartment around 4 AM. I walked into the room I was putting a sleeping Olivia on the bed then putting the rest of my belongings on a chair in the corner. I slipped out of my clothes putting them in the hamper. I put on my plush bath robe on and tied it up walking into the bathroom turning on the shower. I placed my phone down turning on my oil diffuser and the aroma of Eucalyptus filled the bathroom.

"Alexa play current R&B hits." A few moments later the intro for Undecided by Chris Brown filled the bathroom. I took off my robe checking the temperate one more time before sliding in.

The hot water hit my body and I immediately felt relaxed. I leaned my head back letting the hot water soak my curls humming to the lyrics. I have known Derrick for what... 3 weeks and he's been on my mind every single day since. I think he is so fine, he holds himself like a real man and he is really sweet. I don't know if he just feels sorry for me and the situation I'm in or if he's really feeling me. That kiss still had me weak at the knees so I could just imagine what it would be like if it ever goes even further. I have never been kissed like that. His lips and tongue tasted like liquor so he had some liquid courage.

I snapped back into reality and finished up my shower routine so I could finish up my night.

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"So I should be out of here in a few weeks once they finish painting. I'm happy it's just up a few floors I don't have to move all my stuff super far." Khimaya nodded in agreement. We were sitting on her terrace while we ate pizza. Olivia was sound still sound asleep when I came out to eat.

"Maybe you'll find a hot mover." She raised her eyebrow looking at me over her plate of vegan pizza. Khimaya is a Vegan. I don't know how she does it. She only cheats when it comes to Haitian food.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I doubt it." Khimaya scuffed shaking her head. "You know ima be your voice of reason and keep it real with you. I know you are going through a divorce but mentally you've been checked out friend and I get it takes time to heal but I don't want you to wait too long." I took in every word Khimaya said and she's right but I don't know if I'm ready and this soon. I'm going to be a 20-something year old divorced single mom with daddy issues...I have a lot of baggage and men who are willing to deal with that are one in a million. I am okay with living a quiet life by myself with my daughter and get a couple dogs, a cat and have a huge garden.

"So what did Derrick want?" I started chocking on my bite of my pizza as she side eyed me. "I'll wait once you're done." I took a sip of water and cleared my throat. "Just checking Olivia, on my situation with Sasha and the divorce." Khimaya pierced her lips together waving her hand for me to continue. "That's it." I lied.