I Will Wait

Chapter 3

 "Caleb."

There was no turning back now. The chances of escape were slim to none and even that was giving me the benefit of the doubt. Chances were farther away than none. I was stuck.

"Hi. Oh, um. Happy Birthday."

"Thanks." He walked up to me and gave me a hug from the side like nothing had ever happened between us, like I had never promised anything to him, like he had never asked me to promise anything. Playing it cool it would seem. That was all right for me, at least for tonight. I could play it cool. Cool was the thing I did best. I prayed tonight it was what I did best.

"Come on out. Unless you want to stay in and eat all the churros?" he questioned, the corner of his lips quirking in a smirk, revealing a dimple.

My hand shot up to my mouth and I wiped at the corners, feeling the grains of sugar fall from my lips. Could tonight get any more embarrassing? It was Caleb! Why should I be embarrassed about anything? I had seen him in diapers, with a snotty nose on multiple occasions. Sugar on the corners of my mouth was nothing.

Caleb laughed and began walking back out the sliding glass door, nodding his head for me to follow. Reluctantly, I did. The yellow glow of the porch lights hit my skin, casting an almost warm heat. Wow, those were some strong lights. That was when I noticed the fire pit in the middle of the porch. So that was where the heat was coming from. Every part of my brain and common sense was out of place, catapulting me in a whirlwind of all kinds of emotions that were unregulated and eating at my insides.

Just as the heat invaded my body from the oh so inviting campfire, so did the poisonous sting of guilt. I almost burst back inside and jumped into Chris' arms begging he forgive me for how I reacted, the way I blew up on him was completely uncalled for and horrible of me. Instead, I settled for turning around and waited until I caught his gaze, then took the opportunity to mouth the words 'I'm sorry'. His features shifted in a way that was almost a smile, something Chris was well known for. He never usually smiled an actual, bright smile like Caleb. Really, Chris hardly ever smiled at all. They were dark and light but closer than two peas in a pod.

His eyes sparkled and I knew that everything was all right between us. I turned back to the running bodies out back, leaning against the wall of the house watching everyone as they yelled and ran and sweat. They knocked each other off their feet and clambered up just to get pushed over again or return the favor, taking the soccer ball into their control and shooting it into the makeshift goal Caleb had made almost five years ago. It was a God-given miracle it was still standing. There was that ragged hole in the middle where I ran into it and got one of my necklaces stuck. Neither the net or the necklace survived some form of damage from my prying to freedom.

Their shouts and flashes of old memories muddled my thoughts of dread even if the feeling remained, a weight in the pit of my stomach. Or that was the feeling of the ball flying at my gut and forcing out whatever oxygen my lungs possessed. The movement of my body heaving over and grasping at my stomach was in motion before I even realized what had actually happened. Just my luck. Caleb and Joel ran up to me, a hand placed right on the back of my shoulder.

"Stand up straight, Selah. You'll breathe better."

It was Caleb who spoke. That did not surprise me, my brother was too busy trying not to laugh to offer any help and when I stood up I found Caleb had that goofy grin he had been born with plastered across his face like this was America's Funniest Home Videos.

"You good?"

Part of me wanted to go on a screaming rant of how everything was not fine, it was horrible and terrible and everything was falling apart and I almost did too. I almost let it all slide past my lips but caught my impending burst and closed my jaw tight as if that locked the words inside the key hidden within the confines of my thoughts. I settled for nodding my head and taking in as deep a breath as I could in through my nose and out through my mouth. The sound of a woosh slowly whistling past my lips.

"You took a hard hit there, El." Joel all but cackled, and he was supposed to be a twenty-six-year-old man.

"Yeah. Yeah." I swatted him away, gathering back some of the breath that was stolen from me.

I took this as the perfect cue to head back inside. No one questioned my early depature or the fact that I had planned on completely leaving the party and going to hide back and Joel's truck, but I did not tell them that either. The game plan was to grab a churro or five, then head through the kitchen and into the living room, past all the bright memories held safe in glass and to the front door. Chris never questioned what I was doing either, where I was going or why, and he of all people would have been the one to stop me, but he just watched me leave. That was more than all right with me. But I stopped. I never left the house. My hand never reached the door handle. The unfamiliar tone of a familiar voice reached my ears.

"I know." a gasping sob fell from upstairs. "But how will we help him through this?"

Even the blasting from above me could not smother the beating of my heart as panic settled in. My first thought was that he knew. Caleb knew that I had broken my promise and he was heartbroken but when my heart did not stop pounding and I crept up the stairs a few steps, keeping an eye to make certain nobody else was in the room, I knew that was not it. It could have been Chris they were talking about. It was an awful thing, really it was, to be sneaking around like this and eavesdropping. I should not be doing anything of the sort. My hands continued trialing up the smooth, polished railing, there was no turning back.

"We will find a way. God will guide us. He will guide Caleb."

"But why our baby boy?"

Everything was silent after that. Not a single word was uttered. I sat on the stairs, my back sliding down until I hit the step I was standing on, sitting in a strange and uncomfortable position but that hardly mattered because my heart was beating in a way that felt like I was flying a million miles an hour. He could not know? Could he? How could he know? Nobody knew about Bert. I had hardly mentioned him to my mom and Mom would most likely... mention it to Mrs. Rueben who would no doubt tell the family at one point or another. Snickerdoodles and fudgecakes.

Maybe my broken promises had broken him.

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Annndd we are back with another chapter of I Will Wait! So excited to be back after being away for the week. I apologize again for not keeping everyone posted last Wednesday! We are back and with a double feature! So there is another chapter to go on to! Thank you so much for taking the time to read this story and leave comments. Hit the star if you love this story and share with any other rom com, foodie lovers you know! 

-AVA