Royal Frills

Julia

Families were starting to visit us and this should have excited me. However, I was in a sad mood. This was despite that Niki tried to cheer me up. I was told that these puberty blockers would stop me from becoming a teenage boy. My male genitalia would not grow and would not even work. I would not get a deep voice. I would not get hair stubble on my face. The puberty blockers and the medicine would keep me looking like a little child for a long time. One thing was the petticoat treatment. I could deal with that. These blockers and other medicines made it so final. I would never be able to decide that I wanted to be a normal boy. The only logical conclusion is that they did this without my parents knowing.

Niki tried to cheer me up like he usually does. He also got the same blockers as me. It was then that I realized that none of the boys here were tall. They must all have visited the doctor. Niki tried telling me that we were the sissy version of Neverland. We were like a sissy version of Peter Pan. We would never grow up. We could be children forever. I could see some advantages in never growing up. A part of me also wanted to be an adult. I appreciated that Niki did try and cheer me up. Blake did the opposite. He told me that the next step was that I would get an operation that would give me a girl's body. That gave me the shivers.

My family came. They would be staying at a nearby hotel. My dad wanted to have a quiet visit, but mom wanted this to be covered by the media so the media thought that they still loved me and supported this place. We hugged each other for ages. My Dad did not know what to say, so he said that I looked taller. I told him that this was not true and explained what the doctor did to me. I could see my Dad give my mom one of his angry looks. I showed them around the institute and introduced them to the other boys. Julia made me laugh when she commented that the house was like one of her Barbie houses. She also said in a loud voice that the other boys looked just as much like a girl as I did. It was soon time for them to go back to the hotel Julia was upset that she had to go. So after she showed her puppy eyes and a few tears, my parents asked Madam Criben if she could sleep in my room. Madam Criben told me that a guest bed would be put in our bedroom, as Julia was now a big girl and did not need a crib.

Everyone else family came except Niki's parents. He was told that his parents did not have time to visit him. I felt so sorry for Niki. It must have been hard for him to see other families here. I wonder if he felt unloved. How can a boy who was not loved have so much happiness and compassion for others? Niki was smiling and his usual chirpy self. However, I have got to know him over the last few weeks and I know he must have been hurting inside. I did not know what to say, so I asked him if he didn't mind hanging with me and my family. Julia and I could pretend that he was our brother. Niki was so happy when we said that and joked that he is now a princess.

Julia loved the Barbie house. She told me we had the best things and the nicest dresses. She did not understand why girls were not allowed to come here. I remembered that Julia wrote to me that she was confused as to why I was here at the institute. So I showed her where Niki and I painted. I told her that this was my new hobby. I loved painting as it meant I could be in my own world. I could create pretty things and could be proud of what I have done.

"Let me explain why I am here," I started explaining to Julia. "Everyone thought that I was a boy who was spoiled, rude and arrogant. They were afraid that I would end up being a bad person. I was sent here. They treat boys like girls. Sometimes they treat us like babies. They think that by doing this, we will be more compassionate, gentle and nice. We are sissies. I hope you are not embarrassed by me that I am now a baby sissy. Thats what worries me, is that you will be ashamed of me."

Julia hugged me and told me that she would never be embarrassed by me. The only thing that bothered her was that I had nicer dresses. She reminded me of how mean I was before I came here. Now I was nice to her and I did not mind being with her. Julia did not care if I was a sissy or not. She did not care if I wore diapers or not. She did not care what I wore. What she cared about was that I was a sibling that loved her. What she said to me next surprised me. Julia said she could see how happy I was here and how much I liked it here. She thought that I was brave that I decided that I wanted to be here. To my sister, I was her hero and she could never be ashamed of me.