Murphy's law

Chapter 1. Chaos Written into Law

"Ideas govern the world, or throw it into chaos" Auguste Comte.

No one deserves this world. Chaos started six years ago.

I rolled out of bed, quite literally. I rolled out and hit my face on both the nightstand and the floor. I looked down to see the fresh blood slowly seeping over the blood older stains. Blasting Who Took the Dogs Out, my alarm took a couple of tries to turn off, but eventually, it shut up. Cold, unpressurized water greeted me as I hopped in the shower. Trickles of blood mixed in with the water from my new cuts from this morning's misadventure. I miss the hot, powerful water before the damned law. Everyone who wants hot showers gets cold showers and vice versa. As I stumbled through my house, I finally arrived at the kitchen.

I reached for my beloved coffee maker to get a cup of that sweet goodness. I picked up the coffee pot, and as I did, it shattered in my hand, how I don't understand. The shattered coffee pot caused glass and the lovely coffee goodness to spill all over the floor. I love coffee and haven't had a great cup since this damned law. It's all I wanted in life—a good solid cup of coffee. I cleaned up the glass, getting several cuts on my hands and even on my arms. I watched the news with my just-to-hot oatmeal, and today's story was about a new roller coaster opening at a nearby amusement park. To my surprise the ride functioned incredibly well and had no casualties. I put my dishes in the sink after breakfast and went to leave for work. My classic, expensive car wouldn't start, no matter what I tried, I thought I had gotten that fixed but oh well.

So I walked to work and tried to ignore the rain flooding the sidewalk. The weekly podcast I liked didn't upload because their studio burned down, so I guess I could have it worse—no sound, but the sound of the rain and the splash of my footsteps. In the pelting rain, I slipped and fell a couple of times. On the third fall, I heard a crunch as I landed on my arm with total body weight—a snap, a pop, and a flash of red hot pain. I stifled a scream. I rolled over to look at my arm. My forearm was bending the wrong way, and it hurt so much. Slowly the pain went from sharp to rolling. Rolling across my arm and to my stomach. The world began to spin as I tried not to vomit. I walked the rest of the short way to work, hugging my arm to my body, trying not to move it as I breathed shallowly and deeply. Luckily, when I showed up to work, they had a team of doctors and patched my arm up. On the first attempt, one of the doctors wrapped my arm in the cast too hard and cut off circulation. I quickly lost whatever feeling I had left in my arm, but the doctor was able to remove the cast. My arm hurt even more, and after yet another cast, I began to feel better as my broken arm slowly healed.

My office building towered into the sky. Emblazoned above the door was our logo, a man holding a door shut, his back pressed against the door as darkness leaked out. Circling the logo were the words "Office of Yhprum. What can go right must go right." Our office was formed six years ago when the law enforcing Murphy's law passed. The United States of America had found a way to alter reality; laws, such as gravity or relativity, were just small steps compared to what we could now do. Something unexpected happened when the machines got the order to enforce Murphy's law. The opposite also became true simultaneously, thus this office and my job.

The Office of Yhprum building had reflected glass, so it sparkled with the morning rain. Our building was a simple and perfect structure—floor after floor of cubicles with no clutter. Occasionally a post-it note is plastered on a monitor or a barrier, breaking the cleanliness of the office. Cute family photos hung perfectly in the same spot across each cubicle. Row after row of adorable family photos hung in neat frames. Each of the floors is well-carpeted with the same pleasing patterns.

The computer didn't work, so I sat in my newly broken chair and read my book while I waited for IT to finish their work. Around noon the computers rebooted, but no one had sent out the forms we needed, so I spent the rest of the day playing phone tag with some major clients.