"at some point you became the reason i breathe,
and since then every breath becomes another
reason why i love you."
in which her world starts again on her seventeenth birthday.
lowercase intended
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DICK GRAYSON'S HEART STOPPED the morning belle reve's guards had told him cella wasn't taking any visitors, that she was getting worse and the doctors weren't sure what to do to help, that they were trying to get her better through drugs and shock treatment but nothing seemed to be working.
he had gone home sick that day, wanting to share all his new revelations with her, just wanting a second to see her but he wasn't even allowed that.
he contemplated breaking in, but he knew that's not who he was, it wasn't something batman would do. but dick found himself not caring at all, he felt like he failed her, like he had just handed her to the authorities without thinking about what might happen.
his heart didn't beat the same, it never beat faster or slower for anyone it only stayed the same as the days began to turn to weeks, and weeks to months. and before dick realized he let three years pass without ever seeing cella, the one person he was sure would always have a hold on him.
he thought about her everyday, even when he tried to branch out he found himself standing girls up or coming up with phony excuses.
cella was in his dreams, his nightmares, and the future plans he never told anyone about.
his utility belt even held one of her daggers, it was off brand now as the twenty year old went by nightwing but he didn't seem to mind.
his heart had yearned for cella's at every point in his life thus far and deep down he still had hope that she would return to him.
CELLA STARED AT THE WALL in front of her, half listening to the other prisoners around her that were being pardoned.
she had spent three years with a few of them, other ones she was sure just had ways of slipping through the legal system.
"yo ghost," one of the prisoners called, cella cringed at the nickname they had given her so many years ago after accidentally making a guard see his worst fear which happened to be: ghosts.
"you know she don't talk to nobody." one of them commented, inching away from her.
cella didn't mind, she'd never made any connections at belle reve, after a year they stopped paying her any attention, she was shunned to the quietest parts of the prison, locked away as she posed a worldly threat but here she was now on a bus headed straight for gotham city, with nothing to her name but the barlow mansion.
she would have been lying if she said she was beyond terrified, she had no clue what to expect, the only thing she had heard about her situation was that an honorary justice league member would be assimilating her back in to society after having heard about how much she had changed.
she hated it.
she would be out in the world for the first time in three years and she was going to be interrogated the second she was officially free.
"let's go ghost." one of the guards spoke, using a clicker to unlock her handcuffs, gesturing in the direction of a black limousine. cella had half a mind to make some sort of escape — that or just be cuffed again, she was grateful for the silence they gave her.
the cuffs, like most things in belle reve were magic and power proof, but of course there were ways around it.
cella vowed during her time spent to be productive even in the smallest ways, she had come a long way with her power to control the fears of others, learning to balance her new power with her old one, the only thing she had never gotten used to was how draining her powers were, as much as she tried to block it out and forget she still found herself clutching her head and squinting at times when it all became too much.
"hello, cella." a deep voice spoke once she settled into the limo's seat, closest to the door.
cella didn't dare meet his eyes, she already knew what he thought, hell she was more than sure bruce would be the one to supervise her.
"still playing mute?" he questioned lowly, his face covered by a large newspaper.
cella played with her fingers, feeling how rough her skin was after not using a proper shower in three years. "the last time i saw you i was packing my things to get ready to go to belle reve," she spoke, her gaze not leaving her fingers. "i didn't even get to keep anything i packed," she laughed bitterly, "they took it the second i got there."
"you killed a man." bruce stated plainly. "you become a prisoner after that, nothing brings a person back."
"i'm aware," she spoke coldly, crossing her arms as she recognized her home. she knew bruce wanted nothing to do with her, she wasn't even sure why he had agreed to be her "babysitter" after having such a distaste for her wellbeing.
cella shivered as she observed the state of the home, she wasn't even sure if she wanted to sleep there, but it was better than staying with bruce.
"i'll be around ever other day." he explained shortly as the door opened, the winter air hitting her fast as she rolled her eyes at the man, stopping when he spoke again.
"he's in the city for business," he paused, "don't let him down again."
cella held herself back from arguing with the man as he went back to his newspaper, seemingly unbothered by her presence entirely.
she wasn't sure what she would say when she saw dick, cella was scared, unsure of what he would even think about her after all this time, after all the lies she had told to protect him from her mind.
she wasn't even sure he would talk to her, let alone be in the same room and that scared her most of all.
