Unconditional Love [part 1]

Unconditional Love [part 8]

You had put on your nicest outfit, Chris had just finished tying his tie while you helped Willow put her shoes on. Today was a big day, you and the family, as in everyone in the band and girlfriends were going to visit Mason.

“Where are we going mommy?” Willow asked.

“We are gonna go visit your brother.” You said.

Willow was always good at reading your moods. She stood up and hugged you, her tiny arms clung to your body. Chris smiled as he put on his jacket.

“It’ll be okay ladies. Don’t worry. Balz is on his way in the SUV. Ghost, Kylie, Ricky and Jessica are in another car. We’ll be going with Balz and and Angelo to meet them there. Ryan and Allie are going in their car.”

You nodded.

Willow held her arms up so Chris could hold her. He scooped her up and held her close. “Be a good girl Willow.”

“I will!”

Willow still didn’t understand. She knew he was gone, but she didn’t understand it as a whole. When Balz showed up he and Chris put Willow’s car seat in the back. Willow was messing with Angelo’s hair.

“Uncle Angelo, you have soft hair. Can I play with Maggie later?”

“How about I bring Maggie later?” He smiled as he hung Willow upside down.

“Can Maggie come over mommy?” Willow asked as he long hair dangled.

“Of course.”

“You okay?” Angelo asked.

“I’ll be fine.” You half smiled.

He walked over and gave you a hug. “It’ll be okay. I don’t see him as any child ya know… He will always be my nephew.”

You rested you head on his shoulder and shut your eyes. “If it weren’t for you guys I’d be much worse.”

“Hey, we are a family. We aren’t gonna let you fall.” He smiled.

“We’re ready!” Balz said.

Willow ran for Josh and jumped on him.

“Hey spider monkey!” He smiled.

He put her in her seat and grabbed the belts.

“Watch Uncle Josh! I can do it!”

She took the seatbelt and strapped herself in.

“Smarty pants.” Josh smiled as he let you in. Angelo got in on the other side and shut the door. The ride was semi quiet besides Josh and Chris talking about the new music the guys were working on. The cemetery was close now, you could see everyone waiting near their cars in the parking lot. When you got out Willow had swung the door open and ran for Jessica.

“AUNT JESSICA!”

“Willow!” She smiled as she knelt down and opened her arms for a hug.

Kylie held your hand and Chris took your other.

“C’mon.” Chris whispered.

Angelo held onto Willow’s hand as everyone walked for the grave. When you guys got to Mason’s grave Willow let go of Angelo and walked to it.

“Mommy…”

“I know baby.” You said.

Balz sat by the grave stone and rested his head on it. Ryan and Allie set some flowers down.

“Willow, wanna help me pick flowers at the shop for your brother?” Chris asked.

“Yes.” She said as she kissed Balz on the side of his shaved head and hugged him. “I’ll be back uncle Josh.”

“I’ll be here kiddo.” He smiled.

“I’m gonna go with them.” Ricky said.

Jessica nodded.

“I’ll be back my dear.” Ghost told Kylie.

“Okay Love.”

“I’ll leave you ladies to yourselves.” Angelo said as he joined the group.

“I guess they can’t show emotion.” Jessica said trying to lighten the mood.

Kylie wrapped an arm around you, Allie rested her head on your shoulder and Jessica ran her hand up and down your back.

“It hurts more and more every time I think about him. I still blame myself for it. I could’ve helped him.” You whispered.

“No honey, it wasn’t your fault at all.” Kylie said.

“I know babe.” Allie said as she wiped a tear.

Moments later the guys returned with flowers and balloons.

“Mason, I had daddy buy you a balloon!” Willow smiled as she ran for his grave. “We’re gonna tie it to the flowers so it doesn’t float away!”

You sobbed as you saw Willow interact with him. Chris wrapped his arms around you and brought you into a tight hug. You held onto him. 

“Babe, I’m ruining your jacket.”

“Not important right now.” He hummed.

You hugged him even closer. Balz and the guys helped comfort you. 

“Mommy… It’s okay.” Willow said. 

You knelt down in front of her and hugged her as your hands stroked her hair. “I know baby. Mommy is just sad sometimes.”

“I love you.” She smiled. 

You wiped your tears away and smiled. “I love you too baby.”

“Maybe we should go now…” Jessica said. 

“I think that’s what’s best.” Chris said. “We can come back another day okay?”

You nodded. “Okay.”

“Can we get Maggie on the way?” Willow asked. 

“Sure.” Chris said. “Go hug Aunt Allie, Aunt Jessica, Uncle Ricky, Uncle Ryan, and Uncle Ghost goodbye.” 

Willow hugged everyone as Chris waited to put her in her car seat. When you got home you felt drained. You went to lay down on the couch and knocked out. You didn’t even know what time it was. You woke up in bed, Chris was knocked out, Willow was between you two. You looked at the alarm clock by your bed, two AM. You texted Kylie. 

You: Kylie… Are you awake?

Kylie: Mhmm. Watching re-runs of Ru Paul’s Drag Race n.n

You: Can I come over?

Kylie: Sure! You okay? 

You: Eh. :/

Kylie: Come over. I’ll get the cookie dough and scary movies okay?

You: Thanks Kylie. :)

Kylie: You’re family <3

You put on yoga pants and a MIW tee, grabbed your Jacket and wrote Chris a note. 

Chris,

Woke up at 2Am, I’m just a bit shaken with the whole visiting Mason thing from earlier. I’m sorry, I’ll be at Kylie’s place. I love you. I’m fine. Be back soon. 

Love,

Me

When you got to Kylie’s she helped you vent, she listened and you two hung out. Kylie was really understanding. You could be girls together, talk about anything really, she was really and understanding and open minded, not that the others weren’t, but you and Kylie were just close.

“Thanks for letting me come over. I knew you’d be awake.” You smiled.

“Always! I love nights!” She giggled.

You and Kylie hung out watching movies and being girls, online shopping and whatnot.