The way I grew up.

Meeting the World

It started as something new, I could touch, I could smell, play, communicate to other human beings. It felt unusual at first moving my hands and actually being in this world.

The next day my brother was moving all my stuff out of my room and I just sat in the living room watching him, I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm moving your stuff into my room and my stuff into your room" Me sitting there still, "why?" "I want Your room, so you can have my room. We're switching rooms!" He said tensely. "Brother what's wrong?" "Why do you ask that?" " I don't know you just seem irritated or something." "It's nothing, I just asked mom if she would help me switch rooms but she said no do it yourself." "I'm sorry brother, did you want me to help you?" "No that's fine, thanks for asking though."

As the minutes, and hours went by just watching my brother take his stuff out of his room putting them in my now old room, and do the opposite with my stuff, I noticed the shakiness my brother Nicholas had. I've never really noticed and I don't think our mother did either, I've jus tried and tried to ask him why he was always shaking and moves so fast but all he'd say was "it's non of your business, anyways you'd never understand!"
I just wish my brother would open up to me as I did to him, and me being only the age three years old, I didn't have a lot of things to share or need help with.

Later during the day I came up to my brother and asked if I can play his little poke-man game with him, first he looked at me like I was a crazy mental kid that just came out of the hospital and then he finally answered "Why? You don't even know how to play!" I answered "I know but I'm bored and want to play with you brother." After a whiles worth of bugging him he finally agreed to letting me play with him. It was about a hour later of him trying to teach me how to play I still didn't know how to play and he didn't want to play anymore anyways.

After dinner he told me to meet him in my new room which was his old room. When I went in there with him he made me get in the closet. The closet door only open from the outside because the inside of the door the knob jus turns and is locked practically. I asked "why are we in here?" "You'll see" he said. After a couple mins he pulled down my pants and said "If you ever tell mom about this or anyone else I will hurt you!" "Ok" I said scarcely " but what" "SHH!" He said impatiently. "If mom hears you then I'll get in trouble then you'll get hurt, now do you want to get hurt?" "No!" I said. In my head I'm thinking what in the world is he doing to me? As he's feeling my vagina he asked "does that feel good?" I didn't reply, it was so awkward. He pulled out his penis and grabbed my hand, motioning my hand running up and down his penis, I rejected to his motions. "Do it!" He said. I started crying "but I don't want to!" He pulled his pants up and I pulled up mine. He opened the closet door from being cracked shut so we weren't locked in. "I swear to God if you ever tell anyone about this I will hurt you!"

The next morning I woke up, stared at the left side of the wall confused, where I was but after my eyes adjusted to the lighting I remembered me and my brother switched rooms and I was in his old room. I got up from my bed walked out into the hallway and laid down with my blanky outside of the bathroom door waiting for my mom to get out of the shower just like she does every morning.