The Beginning, And The End.

Sense of freedom.?!

~Chapter Five~

~Sense of Freedom~

The first thing I could feel was cold, a chilled air caressing my exposed skin. The second? Pain. It felt as though my body was on fire, burning from every inch, which forced a groan to escape from the depths of my throat.

And, I soon found for it to be meaningless as to return to the hollowness of sleep, so, I begrudgingly motioned towards my eyelids to flick open as I, much too carelessly, sprung up into that of a sitting position, although it proved to be a grave mistake on my part as my hand darted to soothe the aches of my torso.

Though I had to rudely shove the, ordinarily concerning, palpitations aside as I, for the first time, initiated the assessment of my surroundings which actually proved to be quite difficult as I was quick to notice the dimmed sky "I slept through the day..?" I thought, with a sense of panic beginning to work its way up my body, realizing that I had no fucking clue where I was.

Though, with a deep sigh, I slowly hoisted myself up to a standing position, I had no time to waste around in some alley, that's asking to get mugged.. Or worse... But, pushing that thought to the back of my mind, or trying to, I walked on wobbly legs to the exit? entrance? oh who even knows, it was out of the alley, and I peeked my head out, as to bear in mind any troubling activities that could be ensuing at these late hours.

Another involuntary sigh escaped as I noticed nothing out of the ordinary, was I.. Relieved perhaps..? I began walking in an arbitrary direction, hoping to come across someplace to stay for the night "I hate the dark.." I thought, my eyes darting around me while I walked. I felt uneasy, especially about the given circumstances.. But, I mustn't think about things like that for the time being, I need to focus on finding a safe space, "god, I was in such a rush, I didn't grab my bag.. Dammit!" I reflected on the past events, "Why must I be so inept at the simplest of things..?" was one of many thoughts surging through my head. Other thoughts were along the lines of the inevitable awaiting me if I got caught.. My father must be seething... Utter hell hopes for failure, but, that's what drives me... Right...?

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I was on the ground, bleeding. Whack! another hit to my back, it hurt, it hurt so bad. "You're so fucking lucky nobody would listen to a rugged brat like you!" he sneered with a rageful tongue, another smack of the belt making contact with my back, which, consecutively, received a yelp from beneath my lips which made me cry more from the sounds escaping my mouth, knowing what's to come as a result of speech- WHACK! "Ahh! I'm sorry father, I won't try it again!!" I hollered, my mistake... "Shut up! God, you're so annoying. You know what you did, you know the consequences, yet you still dare disrespect me with your bitching?!" I know....I should have never done such stupid things! I internally screamed to myself, as grunts escaped in reality, which just seemed to make his hits get harder and harder...I should have listened to the rules.... As throughout the night I suffered in the silence of my internalized shrieks.. My please......

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Is this what freedom feels like? walking around the city in the dark of night, searching for somewhere potentially safe.. I hate this. My body ached more with every strut forward I took. I couldn't stand it, "I need to sit down... Now.." my mind inadvertently beckoned as my vision swayed.. My wounds must have opened back up with all the physical activity I had pushed in the past hours. I need supplies.. Gauze maybe? "I have no money.. But..." I softly said as my voice wavered ever so slightly.." I need to.." my final thought was interrupted by a soft glow of a light which immediately caught my attention, and, as I lifted my head to see the source, it also caught my interest, a convenience store "Open 24/hours" read a sign. Perfect.

I was quick to enter through the sliding doors as a small ding rang out announcing my presence. The lady at the counter hastily stimulated a response of my entering with the words "Hello! if you need any assistance don't hesitate to ask!" Quite chipper for working the night shift, but I of all people was in no place to judge as I gave a subtle nod to the woman and shuffled away to where I was hoping to find the medical aisle. After a bit of searching, lo and behold, all the supplies to assure you don't die. I expeditiously set about foraging for the right articles. First, gauze, which was very easy to find, along with the rubbing alcohol, some sturdy bandages to keep away bacteria and hopefully protect from further damage. And, with all medical supplies in my grasp, I figured I should grab some water as well, it seems that I'm just now realizing how tired and thirsty I really was. But, finally, with all the supplies I'll need for my trip, I slowly inched to where the exit lies, watching the lady at the counter waiting for the perfect time to book it out of here "I can't believe it.. I'm stealing... I'm awful aren't I..." I shook away the growing thoughts as the lady began walking away from the counter "now.." I thought, but my legs refused to move, "no.... I- I want to live.." And, with those fueling words, I powered up my ability, granting me the capacity to run faster than considered normal, although I was sure this was going to hurt so fucking bad, but "oh well..." I let that final thought surface, while I then began to run as fast as I could out the door, and turning a quick left across the street.

My breath was so fast and ragged, I could barely breathe as I struggled to huff in enough air to compensate for the speed, but I couldn't stop, I was deadly petrified with the thought of the lady potentially following my trail, or perhaps calling the police "Oh god.. What have I done!? I'm awful, trash, worse than both!" I wanted to scream to high heavens, "kill me now, I did it! I'm a criminal!" as tears punctured my orbs while I squeezed tighter at the objects in my arms. I had never stolen anything before.. I had never done anything illegal.

But, my body was aching and my breath was gone. Another alleyway. It seems I'll have to get used to living in these, my body finally reached its limit as I collapsed to the ground as soon as I entered the, hopefully unoccupied, alley.

Although I wanted nothing more than to succumb to the darkness right there and then, my injuries still needed cleaned, infection now would not be near advisable, and so, I nimbly initiate work on my wounds as I took off my blazer along with the under shirt, though, as soon as my torso was exposed to the elements a hiss of pain revealed the signs of living as the chilled air aggravated my flesh wounds.

And, as I figured, my old bandages were soaked in crimson red, and taking them off was hell as the clotted blood clung to the cloth which meant I had to rip them off. Once that was done I could fully assess the damage, and well, it wasn't pretty. There were firstly purple and blue bruises that were quite prominent and a heap of dried blood cracking and flaking around the area which I'd have to clean up. What a pain... I had no time, I was tired as hell and just wanted to rest, so, I grabbed the gauze and tore open the packaging, along with screwing open the bottle of rubbing alcohol, but, before I poured it on my wounds, I bunched up a part of my shirt and bit down on it to suppress the inevitable screams to come once contact is made, and, with a swift yet hesitant motion, I poured a good amount on my torso as to cover all the wounds. And soon, the searing pain followed which just made me bite down harder and harder, successfully suppressing the agonizing screams. but, I must continue...

In order to finish the job, I grabbed the gauze and began gently rubbing away the dried blood and once that was done I made sure all the wounds are clean and held some gauze on ones that started bleeding again,which once accomplished, it allowed for me to wrap the injuries away from the world, which I considerably lagged in more than found agreeable, But how else was I to shift than bovine..Everything hurt tremendously.

After seeming like forever, I finished my torso, which proved to be the worst out of all as the others just needed some re-wrapping, which I effectively did, and the moment I finished I collapsed onto the ground, spitting out my shirt in the process.

Although I wanted to pass out, there was something I wanted much more at the moment.."water..." I quietly expressed as I snatched the bottle and began to slowly sip away at it, replenishing my thirst, and after, I began changing back into my uniform, though using my blazer as a sort of headrest, and, as I finally let my body do what it must.. pass out..."please..let tomorrow.. be... better...." I softly spoke before I closed my eyes, letting myself sink into the weightlessness of sleep.

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