My universe oneshots

"You met WHO?!"

Alistair was up.
He didn't really know what time it was. He just knew it was late.
He never understood the moon or how to tell what time it was. Alistair was never able to understand things like that very easily.

But he did know how to relight the fire.
He tried to talk to Abner but he wasn't responding. Which isn't unusual for them so he just sat in silence.

After maybe 30 minutes or so he heard something in the tent behind him.
He looked behind him to see his friend standing there.
"Hey T." He said.
"Hey.." She said still seeming tired.
"Couldn't sleep?" She asked sitting next to him.
"Yeah its been getting a bit more difficult lately."
"Don't let anyone else hear you say that. They'll send you to a mental institution oooooo" She joked.
Alistair smiled.
They had been traveling with each other for centuries. They made a habit of picking up on what was going on and joking about it. They recently had learned about mental institutions and how they were basically just jail cells for people who nobody wanted around. Pretty horrendous if you think about it. Like sure he may have done some horrible stuff to people but atleast he got it over with quick. He never let them suffer for long. Unlike those fucks.
Alistair looked over and saw two eyes staring at him from the trees.
"JESUS CHRIST-" Alistair fell of the log he was sitting on.
"Calm down Al- Its just a squirrel..." T looked at Alistair. She was definitely trying to hold in her laugh.
"Oh.."
"You know.." T said getting Alistairs attention.
"I met that guy once."
"Huh?" Alistair responded confused.
"Jesus Christ."
"..."
"Are you like..saying that as...."
"Im saying that I met Jesus Christ."
"...You what..." Alistair said staring at her like she was crazy.

"Well I happened to be in the area while he was alive and him and I talked for a bit. I think he might have been a little insane though.."

"Sometimes I forget how old you are." Alistair said getting back on the log.

"Hey..." T said

"I'm just saying." Alistair responded.

"Listen I don't think Abner is all that young either."

"He doesn't count."

"Oh yes he does."

Alistair squints at T.

"Don't give me that look we both know its true."
"I'm sending you to a mental institution."
"Cool maybe they'll give me a lobotomy!" T joked
"And then they'll experiment on you when they realize you don't age." Alistair said smirking.
"Hah or they'll realize I'm big all mighty The Lost Traveler!"
"Oh cmon you're not THAT famous. Don't be so full of yourself." Alistair joked.
"..."
"Al we have killed thousands of people. We are definitely on some wanted posters..."
"Yeah you have a point." Alistair said laughing.
T just sighed
The two continued talking til the sun came up.