"You're playing with lightening Yoon Jeonghan. I'm not an innocent woman. Go play with little girls because I, Cennet Kaplan, I play with guns and grenades"
1 year,
1 life,
1 girl,
And 1 man who doesn't give two shits about his idol image. His hear...
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"Cennet....yapma!"
That came too late. I'd already fired my father's handgun at one of the goats roaming around the farm. My Dadi looked at me like I just took out an entire planet.
My second kill.....won't be my last.
I've always been a curious kid, I mean it was unavoidable since I was left with nothing to do after homeschooling hours. Yep, father never let me see the four walls of a school, he said I needed to be protected. I always asked him; what or whom I need to be protected from? But he never gave me an answer.
Dadi cried so much over that goat I was upset for days. It's just a goat, a damn ruminant! And we have over a hundred more.
Father came home that night and cast me a look that I never understood but now I do because then I just turned twelve and now, now I'm 31 and I see the world much more differently.
I grew up playing with guns and knives, father tried, oh yes he really tried hard to make me play with dolls and all that girly junk. Dadi and the maids would jest saying, 'Theres no single girl blood in this one' But truly it was such an adventure for me. After some time, father finally let me go hunting. Well, that's because I began hunting down his pets; the parrot, the dog and our cat Nala. They had it tough from me but thankfully they survived to warn the other animals.
Now I'm 31, with a three-year old daughter, no job and no family in a not-so- strange land; South Korea. I told father I wanted to go to Mexico since I turned 20 but father being father said, 'No, it's too dangerous Beren' Do I still want to go to Mexico? I think not, especially with father's dealings over there. South Korea is the perfect place to live - To hide.
A knock on my door and my housekeeper who doubles as my daughter's live-in nanny walks in. I'm most certain she wants to check if I've fallen asleep, which would be a miracle if I ever did.
"Not going out today?" Ms Lee says. She has that warm smile on her face as she stares at me.
Ms Lee is my lifesaver here in Korea, taking care of my four bedroom home and still looking after my daughter. It's amazing how she does this so well because she's never been married. She also has no children but we call her Halmeoni because a certain three year old in my house feels she's her grand mother. She speaks perfect English because she lived in the US for over 20 years working as a nanny
"I will...... just need another shower," I reply, hopping out of bed and heading to my closet.
"You need friends, Cennet," she remarks, rubbing her arms. I knew where this was headed, and I wasn't ready for that conversation.
"I don't," I respond, grabbing a black dress from the hanger.
"It's been 3 years," she persists, and I grip the dress tightly.
"And I am doing just fine. We're all doing fine" I snap, "now would you please excuse me I have to shower"
She just shakes her head, raising her hands in surrender as she exits the room. I sigh and walk into my bathroom for a quick shower, my fifth for the day because I am needy as hell and my entire body burns. I need a man to do shit to and with me this night, not friends.
