Moon Tears

Chapter ♡ 5

The space inside the meditation centre for wolves feels like a den – with an open space leading to a small Japanese style garden with little bonsais beckoning me forward.

The cute little trees were the first things I gravitated toward, including the whole garden, which opened into the space we'd all do the therapy together.

A woman called Stella was handing out futons for anyone who wanted to try lying down. I notice Violet, Audrey, Jim and Clyde choose the luxury of the bean bags. Lynda happily wants a futon. I actually wanted a beanbag but I've missed out because I wandered into the garden.

I feel like a naughty child when Seth appears at my shoulder, "We're starting soon, love," Seth can see me lingering near a bonsai I can't get enough of. It's bent over and looks like it was drooping, then it started to rise again. I really like the twisted little trunk.

"But isn't it so cute? I've always wanted a bonsai, I used to read books about them," I point at it, like he can't see it, then I realise I'm wasting time, "Sorry. Heh –" I'm starting to think Seth thinks I'm actually so cute, with the way his mouth is trying very hard not to tug out into a big grin. Oh, gosh, I made a fool of myself. He's so amused by the random thing that made me so happy that he can't even say anything – he just lightly holds out a hand for my back and I step into it, leaning into his strength as he guides me back.

Now I have a silly little smile on my face... until I reach the futon and I remember I missed out on a comfy spot.

I sit down on mine next to Lynda, who's already lying back, staring at the ceiling. When I look up, a lamp is throwing out green waves onto the walls.

Entranced, I stare at it as Stella introduces us to the meditation session.

"Who's done meditation before?" Stella asks.

Lynda puts up her hand, but no one else.

"I'm all about it," Lynda is proud to admit this, "Haven't been in years, glad to be here again."

"I remembered you. It's good to see you again," Stella beams, "And – I hear we have a human present too?" she glances at me. I blush, Seth immediately approaches Stella to look over us.

"Elizabeth is one of the pack," Seth's inclusive language has me blushing like mad.

"Oh, I know. You're very welcome here, Elizabeth," Stella begins by helping us steady our breathing first and asking us to get into a comfortable position. I cross my legs and just hold my ankles, wriggling my toes. It's not exactly comfortable but there's not much I can do. When she plays the meditation music, it's the white noise of a forest.

Not exactly my type of sound to relax too – since I was raped in the forest. But no one knows that yet.

Even though the white noise is objectively very nice, I'm already tense.

"This is your safe space, no one else can enter..." Stella begins the prompt.

Seth adds, "If you think they can enter, be assured, I won't let anyone close," and this does bring a tiny smile out of me, as I try to close my eyes but I keep peeking out as I see Seth helping Audrey with something. He brings her a bunch of tissues and then he finds Clyde with his eyes wide open, looking freaked out. Seth speaks so quietly I can't even hear the words.

But I look around and Lynda is right into it, Jim and Violet too – they have no trouble.

Audrey wipes away some tears and gets comfortable.

Eventually everyone is quietly breathing, but Clyde keeps Seth by him as he murmurs what's on his mind.

I can hear some of it "...I can't unsee it..."