Moon Tears

Chapter ♡ 21

An indeterminate amount of time has passed. I've walked so far into the forest I don't even know where I am. I've just kept going, wanting to lose myself and get so far away from that reality that I don't even have to be connected to it anymore.

I want to forget it.

I'm not even afraid of the night, I'm afraid of the truth.

Soon my heart gets so heavy that I have to stop and just breathe.

I put my hand to my rib cage, where the knife had gone in at a bad angle, missing vital organs on that fateful night.

If he passed out, he didn't try to kill me. But he did hurt me on the most terrifying night of my life. The night that changed my life for the worst.

There's a small clearing, and I feel a bump in my pocket attached to my pants. I reach into the pocket as I look up at the moon, and the shine of it almost burns.

I fumble for the thing I put in there, the thing Sail gave me... I pull it out and I look at the small pearl pocket mirror.

I open it up, looking for my answer.

I see myself, I see the moon, a basic reflection. Nothing.

I usually can't look at myself but now it's for a different reason. I close the pocket mirror because I get a sharp pain in my head.

I turn away from the moon, wondering if I have a migraine and that's why the light hurts my eyes. I shield my face as I stumble in a different direction, feeling the pain fade to a dull throb. I walk until I have to grab onto a tree and steady myself from the way my body is protesting. Its like my body is physically trying to detach from my mind.

"What?" I whisper out loud, asking myself, "What... what do you want me to do?" I hiss against the tree, banging my head against it and breathing just a moment to understand what my gut is telling me.

I feel like I'm ripping into two.

The version of me that was traumatised, empty... a void.

And me now – full and growing. Healing.

But that was a happy fantasy. In me you see a dream, he said. Just a dream.

"Seth, please!" I hear a faint scream from Lynda followed by Violet also yelling out and Jim screaming out "No!" but then I also hear Clyde yelling over all of them to "Leave him be! Let him go!"

They all sound panicked and confused about how to handle Seth. What is he doing?!

Leaving the camp?

Now my body moves on instinct.

I start sprinting back toward where I last heard the voices. I'll intercept him soon.

I had been consumed with my own trauma, but now I'm focused back on him.

Something terrible is about to happen!

But I don't imagine Seth becoming violent and killing everyone for being exposed – I imagine Seth hurting himself.

I run until I hear branches breaking ahead of me and then I see a figure up ahead, just a silhouette of the Alpha I had fallen for.

I look where he's headed. North.

Seth's walking toward Firwood scenic cliffs, his stride is strong and his gaze is forward. Determined.

My throat closes up, I can't scream or talk, I just run faster, tripping on my pants for being too long. In a frenzy, I twist and turn, running and tripping more through a bramble. I'm all scratched up as I fall hard into his oncoming path, my knees slamming into the ground. I don't care that I've fallen, my adrenaline makes me jump right up and I hold up both my hands, to stop Seth walking any further.