Irish Lullaby (Book One of A Violent Melody Duet)

Chapter Thirteen

They hadn't ended up being seen by Edward or Ava. Fallon had dropped down and rolled under the table at the sight of them, much to Ronan's amusement, he got up after telling her a quick goodbye and disappeared into the crowd. She stayed at the table till she was noticed and the two joined her. Garren was still at Ava's parents house, they were watching the boy for a few hours while the two of them had time together.
Ava had felt bad for all the time Fallon had been spending alone and got Edward to take them to the market to meet. Ava had good intentions but they were misplaced, she would have been much happier here with Ronan. That was not something she could voice to either of them as he was still an enemy of her family's even if her thoughts circled around him.
What was he doing, what was he thinking, when would she see him again, it went on and on and on. She assumed this is what a crush was, she had never had one before. The feelings were all so new and so weirdly placed as she still tried to handle everything else that had happened in her life. One moment she would blush at the thought of his hands on her and the next she would be back at her aunt's house screaming on the inside as her voice wouldn't come. She'd go from smiling at a memory to crying in seconds, she just wanted to be better but even with the comfort Ronan brought her mind was so frustrated.
Another week passed and she began to eat more, she would go to the store and pick out her own foods and cook her own meals. she didn't get a chance to see Ronan, Ava was with her a lot and her brother had even gone with her on two outings. Ava and her spoke when they were out, mainly Ava holding the conversation. When it was her brother with her not much was said, she didn't know how to feel about him and he didn't know how to talk to anyone besides Ava with ease.
He was different now, he still didn't show any obvious signs of caring. She wondered if it was more Ava pushing him to do better than an actual desire to do so. Maybe he had mentioned to her the treatment she had received as a child. She had been taunted and ridiculed, she'd been slapped and almost killed, and then she had just been ignored. When she was really young sometimes she wondered if she had the ability to become invisible with how little she was noticed.
Even as she lay on the ground crying after one of her brothers shoved her, most likely down the stairs again, no one came to check on her if her nanny wasn't around. She remembered once when Tomas had locked her in a closet and she had heard her other brothers laugh at her sobs. At one point she had heard the heavy feet of her father and had begged him through hiccups and tears to let her out.

"You got yourself in there, you can get yourself out."

She stayed there until morning when her tutor showed up for her lessons. She sat through them all, hungry and disgusting as she had soiled herself hours earlier. She was not allowed to change before lessons, her father didn't want her to waste the tutor's time and kept one of his men in the room to make sure she listened to instructions.
She slept with the lights on for years after that night. Edward had known it happened, she remembered seeing his still face as she was dragged down the hall by Tomas. Remembered how he watched her until the door slammed shut, remembered his soft steps as he walked away from it all.
She didn't understand how to feel about her brother. She couldn't find it in her to hate him but she knew she would never be able to love him, not after everything. She did love her nephew though, the sweet innocent boy who she hoped would never experience the childhood she and even her brothers had.
Their parents were the reasons they were who they were but she would fight tooth and nail to not become as wicked as they were while her brothers for the most part seemed content in the roles given. She was not the only chess piece on their board, the four pawns they had raised moved just as needed.

"Let's go in here." She had been out shopping with Ava, purchasing clothes and other items they already had dozens of.

They had the money to purchase a new outfit for each meal of the day and Ava seemed to enjoy purchasing enough clothing to do just that. The women could shop, Fallon however could not. She never was allowed to pick her own clothing and being in a store with so many choices for her to pick from made her unexpectedly anxious.
She wanted to buy herself new items, wanted to find clothes for herself and no one else but she just didn't even know what she liked. Ava was patient with her as she tried on clothes, even began to bring her different types to try. Some frilly pale things, others loose, when she brought her a long black dress she found herself looking at it on its hanger. It was a simple dress, sleeves that fell to her wrist, no low back, a neckline that dipped low, and a form fitting body that would reach just above her knees.
She liked it, liked how it fit and how it made her feel as she looked at herself in the mirror. At the next store she found more tight fitting black clothes, anything dark and tight. By the time she was ready to fall asleep on the side of the street Ava was ready to stop shopping. They both had enough bags that the truck was filled to the top and even David looked winded from carrying so many bags.
They stopped for dinner at a restaurant Ava loved and enjoyed the meal as Ava talked about her family when the topic of the wedding was brought up.

"I have a date set at a boutique to look for your dress." She had forgotten about the wedding, almost.

She knew it was there, always looming over her head but with everything else she had been through and the time she had spent with Ronan and on her own she was able to pretend for a small moment in time that she wasn't engaged to be married to one of the most vile pieces of living filth on this planet. She was supposed to be planning the final details while here and hadn't done anything of the sorts. If she had to guess why the answer would be the very anxious sister in law across from her.

"I wanted to push it off but if there are any alterations that need to be made it has to be done soon. If you aren't ready I could probably push it." She placed her hand on top of Ava's and squeezed it. They both froze and looked down to where their skin touched.

She had willingly touched another person, other than Ronan she still shrieked back at someone even being too close to her. But here she was with her hand pressed to the warm one of her sister in laws and she felt no need to pull back in fear. She wanted to ease Ava's worries the way she had been doing since the moment she realized how bad Fallon was doing.
Ava was holding back her joy, could see it in the restrained smile and the way she could feel her foot bouncing under the table, she didn't want to freak her out and Fallon appreciated that. She squeezed her hand once more before slowly drawing back.

"I can try on a few dresses, I don't care all too much about what I wear anyway so it won't be too long of an outing." She opened her mouth to reply but quickly shut it.

"It is on Thursday this week, your mother suggested I invite the other sisters to come with us." Oh.

"Will my brothers be with them?" Please say no, please say no.

"Yes, Donavan will not be able to attend but Henry and Tomas, along with their wives, will be staying with us for a few days." She placed her hands below the table as they began to curl and uncurl into fists and her breathing became shaky.

She could feel her heartbeat in her neck, could feel blood pounding in her ears. "I will be a moment, I need to use the restroom." The chair loudly scraped across the floor drawing eyes to them that she did not take notice of. Her only focus was the door across the dining area that led to the restroom.

She could feel David following her as she ungracefully rushed to the door and slapped her palms into it before slamming it shut and locking it. Her hands gripped the cool granite of the sink edge and her eyes locked onto her reflection in the large mirror that took up almost all the wall.
She looked frantic, like a wild animal caught in a trap. She felt just as much, she was doing better and this. Now her fucking brothers were coming to bring her back to that dark space she was in as a child. She had only escaped it in the last few years when the last of them moved out and she finally had true solitude.
Her parents never hit her, they just didn't care enough to stop their other children from doing so. Henry was the worst of them, he'd been the one who smiled as she fell to what they both assumed would be her death when she was six and he was eleven. He had calmed for a while after that event as his parents forced the matter but he was still there whispering words and setting small traps.
In another life he was a snake, an evil slithering creature who waited out for its weaker prey. He strikes when least expecting it, something hard to do when Fallon always expected it. Now she would be stuck in a home, smaller than the last, with him for days.
She was not that girl anymore, she had worse monsters to face then her older brother and this time she had David. She was pretty sure he would kill her brother before he allowed any physical harm to happen upon her.
She straightened herself out and dabbed her face with some water, once she was put back together she gave herself another hard look in the mirror. She would not let this be the last break in her already so fractured strength. She'd stab him with a butter knife before she let him wreck her. She took a deep breath and unlocked the door.

She would get through this.