August 30, 2024
TANYA ELISHA
THE night is still young, as they say. The sun is still slowly being hugged by the night sky. A shade of dark blue with a pinch of orange is bringing solace to my heart.
Pero hindi ko pa rin maitatago ang kaunting kurot na patuloy na nagpapadaing sa'king pakiramdam.
This month has been unbearable for me. A lot of changes ruthlessly unfold without any warning. I can't do anything but brace myself up and be forced to face all of it.
Dinama ko ang naghahalong init at lamig sa railings dito sa balcony ng kwarto ko.
I stared at the sunset while wearing my ocean-inspired mermaid gown, with my hair in a bun and white heels. Kanina pa ako inayusan at hinihintay ko na lamang na magsimula ang selebrasyon.
For now, all I could do is take a breather and have an introspection as I enter another chapter of my life.
Being eighteen is a little scary because it's between teenhood and adulthood. Slowly leaving the youth of being a teen, at the same time, entering the youthfulness of being an adult.
As I look back, maraming kabaliwan na desisyon ang aking nagawa. Some brought pain, but at the same time, moments that I'll cherish forever. Both are tremendously beneficial, though.
Unti-unti akong bumalik sa ulirat nang maramdaman ko ang presensya ni Mom sa likod ko. I know that it's her because of the heels vibrating on my floor, which always announces her arrival.
"Happy birthday, my beautiful daughter." Her sweet voice hugged my ear and made me smile.
I turned to face my Mom, and she immediately gave me a warm hug.
"I'm sorry if I can't always be by your side. But I want to let you know that I love you," genuineness filled her voice.
My heart was engulfed by her love, and all I can answer are tears.
"I love you, Mom," tila bulong na lamang nang banggitin ko iyon.
AFTER the heartfelt moment my mom and I shared, the celebration was now happening right before my eyes.
Our garden is filled with upbeat music, amazing foods, people I love, and azure-colored decorations.
I took a deep breath as I roamed my eyes over this beautiful scenery, and I couldn't help but embrace the serenity filling my heart.
Although there's still a hint of ache, but it was slowly forming into a different feeling that I couldn't name yet.
"Maybe all I need to do is identify what really matters in my life," I whispered to myself.
My girls approached my couch—which is placed in the center of the stage—while carrying wine glasses in their hands.
"Let's dance, bb," tipsy Julia greeted me with a sly grin.
"Come on!" Sofia loudly said in my ears and grabbed my arm. While Lia just showed me her hips moving.
When we started dancing, my eyes caught Liam staring at me. He showed me a sweet smile as our eyes met. I shyly shifted my gaze to my girls and continued swaying.
"Happy birthday, Tanya~" Diana almost stumbled upon a random guy. "Oops," she said between her gulps.
"Thank you, Diana." I was caught in shock as she gave me a hug.
As I look around me, I can help but feel grateful for the people I am surrounded by. Some people are right for me, some may not—but life is meant to be a mystery.
You always need to figure it out and not lose yourself along the way.
A fresh start, it is.
BINABASA MO ANG
Yesterday's Dream | ✓
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