Between Clouds and Closure

Catfights and Crossfires

"I think I'm falling for you, Ava Fitzgerald," he said, gently stroking my arm, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. We were cuddling on my sister's couch as we watched TV. She'd had a court case that morning, so she wasn't home yet.

I chuckled. "First of all, my name isn't even Fitzgerald and you know that."
"Yes, but it's the textbook 'Fitz' name I know," he replied and I playfully rolled my eyes.
"Second, you've known me for less than two weeks."
"The best 'less than two weeks' of my life." He smiled, looking down at me, his fingers skimming past my shoulders to cup my neck.

We had been seeing each other everyday since I called him up for our second hang out. Being that I had practically lived here, I deigned myself his tour guide. We visited the Golden Gate Bridge, Lake Tahoe and went wine tasting at Temecula Valley because Bryce had a thing for wine. I told him my sister would have been jealous we went there without inviting her, seeing as she too loved a good wine.

A part of me knew that whatever it was between Bryce and I was going a little too fast, faster than Adam and I. As much as I tried to pull the brakes on it, it felt like I was careening deeper into it. I haven't known him long enough to know him all that well, so, I didn't deceive myself that I did . But I couldn't deny how he made me feel. I hadn't felt that important to someone in a while, I hadn't felt like I was a need and he made me feel that.

Having someone cheat on you and act indifferent about it, does something to your self esteem. You begin to question if you were the problem, if you were never enough, if there was something you could have done differently. Adam didn't beg me as I walked out that day, didn't stop me. I wouldn't have forgiven him either way but it'd have made me feel better that I hadn't wasted twelve years of my life.

"Where'd you go?" Bryce asked, bringing me out of my thoughts, his fingers stroking my chin.
"I...".
"I hope I didn't freak you out by saying that?" He asked, his brows furrowed in concern.
"No, you didn't," I said with a small smile.
" I know you said you're separated and I'm not rushing you into anything but I just want you to know how I feel about you."
I move back an inch, taken aback. I hadn't told him I was separated but I guess he assumed that since I said my marriage was complicated, it equated to being separated.
I didn't give a reply, I just nodded and snuggled closer to him, and continued to watch the long forgotten movie.

When the movie ended, even though I hadn't really been paying attention to it, I felt Bryce try to get up from behind me. And so, I sat up to let him.
"I have to go," he said, sitting with his legs on either side of me, nuzzling my neck.
"I don't want you to," I reply, leaning into him.
"I know," he says, placing a light kiss at the base of my neck.

I stood up and he did too. Turning me to face him, he put one of his hands on my waist, his other hand under my chin, tilting it up.
He leaned down to capture my lips between his. It wasn't the first time we were kissing, but that didn't stop the butterflies from erupting in my stomach. I could feel both his hands cup my chin, pulling my face even closer. His tongue darted out to swipe across my lower lip and I opened my mouth to let him in. He tasted like the grape juice I'd offered him when he got here.

We pulled apart after several seconds, both of us mildly out of breath. His hair looked tussled and I realised I must have done that. His lips were swollen and his eyes were glazed with desire. We swivelled around when we heard the sound of the front door open to reveal my sister. She was dressed in a black pant suit, her white collared shirt still neatly tucked in.

She slowed her pace, looking visibly surprised to see Bryce standing there. She stretched out her hand when she was close enough and said " You must be..."
"Bryce. You must be Rosa. I've heard a lot about you," he said, taking her outstretched hand.
"You must be the one my sister has been sneaking off to see every day," she said, smiling broadly.
I said "I wasn't sneaking off," at the same time he said "I hope so."
"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Bryce."
"The pleasure is mine."

When she doesn't move to leave, a smile plastered on her face, he looked at me. "I'll see you tomorrow, Ava," he said, placing a kiss on my cheek and walking out. I forgot to tell him I wouldn't be seeing him for a couple of days, because I decided to humour Adam and hear whatever he had to say, albeit useless now.

When the door clicked shut, she turned to me, the smile disappearing from her face like it was never there.

"Don't be stupid, Ava, you're making a mistake," she snapped.
"Thanks for the vote of confidence, Rosa." I said with an eye roll, going to clear the table with the leftover snacks where Bryce and I had eaten.
"I'm just looking out for you mi corazón. Not only as your big sister but as your lawyer, You do...What are you doing? The maids will clean that up." She said distractedly, when she noticed me clearing the table.

" I can clean up after myself." I replied and took the empty wrappers and rubbish to the kitchen. The clicking sound of heels behind me indicated that she'd followed me to the kitchen as well.

"You don't want this affecting everything you've worked for this past year. One wrong move and everything blows up in your face. You don't want to give Adam a reason to turn this on you. If he does, you lose everything." She continued.

"If by 'everything', you mean his money, then that's fine. You're the one who said you were happy I was moving on anyway. "

"I am, but for someone you've known for all of two seconds? Does this ring a bell? You're falling into the same hole you did with Adam. And I didn't think it'd be happening this fast. I'm only asking you to slow down and not make rash decisions."

"I'm not making any rash decisions, so you need to stop talking to me like I'm stupid. Bold of you to think you're the marriage expert considering how yours is fairing these days." I said,  defensively. I knew I shouldn't have said that, but I didn't appreciate her talking down at me .

"What's that supposed to mean?" She asked and when I looked to her, she appeared like I'd physically hit her.

"It means that if you spent a modicum of the energy you did being invested in my marriage  on yours, you'd see what's glaring at you right in the face" I said hotly. 'Take it back, please take it back', my mind begged but I didn't, I couldn't.

Telling by the expression on my sister's face, I knew that the damage was done. She schooled her features into a cold mask.
" I don't need to defend my husband to you, but just because yours cheated doesn't mean mine is. And you have some nerve throwing around such allegations in said husband's house. Don't make me regret taking your case, Ava. You might be my sister but you're also my client and I can drop your case faster than you can say Jack."

"You wouldn't!" I said, taken aback by her fierce tone and the imminent threat in her voice. Rarely did Rosa and I get like this, exchanging words to hurt the other.

"Don't test it, Ava. I'm sure you can keep it in your pants for the next couple of weeks till this is done. Then you can screw any To..."

My palm was on her cheek faster than I could process it, before the rest of her sentence even fell.

The darkness that clouded my vision was blinding . "I can take Adam calling me names but not you, never you!" I yelled. Adam had called me a whore in many different ways but for my sister to insinuate it, was more than hurtful, especially taking into consideration that she knew Adam was the only man I've ever been with.

She didn't seem offended that I had hit her, considering it would be the first time I was doing so. "I didn't mean t..." she started with what would have been an apology but stopped, possibly remembering that I'd insulted her first.

It would have been better if she had kicked me out, but she hadn't and we both stood watching each other. She gave me one last look of hurt mixed with disgust that probably mirrored the expression on my face, before she turned around, her heels clicking as she climbed the stairs.

I had voiced out her deepest fears and thrown it in her face. She didn't deserve it but I couldn't apologize just yet, she'd said her fair share of hurtful words as well. Her husband was yet to come back home, giving excuses, each one more ridiculous than the last. We both needed to give each other some space to cool off. So, I made my way to my room.