To Live Again

PROLOGUE

She could hear their screams as she drove up to the scene. Her husband put their eldest son on the front lawn before he rushed back into the burning building for their other son. They were just supposed to be going to clean out the rental; that was it. They were supposed to be in and out. No one thought that a fire would start from the back of the house, which now engulfed the entirety of their rental home.

  She could feel the stares on her back as she watched them lower her husband and son's bodies into their graves. Tears pooled in her eyes as she watched two more important people disappear into the ground. She slowly grabbed a handful of dirt and let it fall into the hole.

Her eldest son, Everett, stood beside her as he held his baby sister, Aurelia, in his arms. Their grandmother, Nia, watched in sadness from a few steps away. Everett was broken, utterly broken, as he watched his youngest brother be buried next to their father. His sister would never remember their father's silly voices or feel protected as he hugged them when they were sad. She would never remember their father; she would only know him through stories. Fate was so cruel.

A few months later, the mother entered a downward spiral. She holed herself in her house, rarely leaving the familiar home. Her grief was overwhelming her soul. Everything inside of it reminded her of them.

Her son was struggling, and she could do nothing but helplessly watch from the sidelines. He rarely spoke to anyone as the memories of his father and little brother's screams filled his days and nights with terror.

The woman sat on her outside couch and watched the sun go down in the heat of August. Nia walked towards her daughter-in-law with two cups of sweet, iced tea.

"Rose, you cannot keep doing this to yourself," Nia said as she handed her a cup.

"He is here, Nia. I can feel him." Rose said as she sipped her tea and kept her gaze on the floor.

Nia sucked in a breath. She wished she could see them again, but she knew where their souls were, and they were not Earth-bound. Nia let out her breath as she spoke the words she hated saying out loud.

"Carter is not here, and he is not coming back." Nia's voice cracked as she kept herself composed. "It would be best if you accepted that. Your children need you." Rose grew silent again as she stared into the trees and watched on in a daze. "Everett is slipping, Rose. He needs therapy."

Rose glanced through the large window and saw her son staring at the TV blankly. She knew he did, but every time she tried to mention it, the boy refused profusely.

"He does not want to go," Rose said simply, shrugging and looking down at her cup.

"Carter would make him. Sometimes, as a parent, you have to make the hard decisions for your children. He may not like it, but he needs it, Rose. He blames himself," Nia said as she glanced back at her grandson before looking back at the woman and drinking from her cup. "You both do."

"He is not to blame; it was not his fault!" Rose protested as she spilled some of her tea on the ground, purposefully ignoring the other part of Nia's comment.

"He does not feel that way." Nia let out a huff of frustration before she took her nearly empty cup to the kitchen, with Rose following behind her. "I love you, Rosalynn, I always have. You have always felt like a daughter to me. And that is why I am telling you what you need to hear. This grief is drowning you." Nia said as she held Rose's hand. "You have to grieve him properly, both of them. And then... then you have to let them go." Nia said with tears in her eyes before she left the house.

Rose stared after her as she left, vividly remembering a conversation she had with Carter after her uncle passed away.

"Grief will always be a part of you. We do not know why things like this happen, Artie." Carter said as he tried to console her.