Love

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A/N: hey y'all, sorry for being dead. i didn't expect this book to get over 100 reads so thanks for that, i think last time it was at what like 50 reads? ik y'all skip these a/n's so i'll just wrap things up from here. also yes, i did edit the cover image<3







USER: 12 1 9 14



DECIPHERING...



USER: LAIN




P.O.V                 LAIN


It's been a few months since my little (A/N: LITTLE??? 💀) faint. School's over in 2 months and I'm not prepared for the exams at all. I guess it's mostly because I'm skipping class. I just can't stand being in a classroom. The environment itself makes me stressed and I can hardly focus, minus the hallucinations. Alice has been more distant from me. Was it because I fainted last time? Or is it because how poorly Reika's been treating me and nowshe's under her influence? Maybe both? I'm writing this down as I think and I can't seem to find any other pieces for my Navi. I miss being able to look forward for a new day, now every time i wake up I just feel dread draping over my shoulders: and no, I'm not talking about Dread Metal.

I hate this feeling but I hate the feeling of missing someone more. When you miss someone and you're apart from them for a day unable to see them the day starts too stretch out even longer. I start to miss that person the more I think about it and the longer I think about that feeling the more sick I get. I hate that feeling. I hate the feeling of missing someone. I hate the feeling of yearning for that other person. I... I hate ever getting myself into that situation. I don't hate the person... but I feel like they hate me. I want to warm up to them but they ignore me. I don't feel embarrassed. I just feel nothing. Like I shouldn't have tried to reach out to that other person again. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything to begin with. Maybe I should've kept quiet. Maybe... Maybe I hate them for doing this to me. I don't feel any hatred so that's probably not it. I guess I hate myself for not being ready. I just jumped right in, head over heels and now look where that's got me. I hate this. I can't fix the mistake I made. I can't live with myself anymore... but I still am. Right now. Right here. Right over there. Everywhere. Maybe I'm not the me that did that. Maybe that was another me. Maybe this me that's writing right now isn't the me that decided to jump straight into a relationship. If I keep telling myself that, will this feeling go away? I can hear static. I can't hear my thoughts anymore. How am I still writing? Am I even writing?

Alice...

Please...

If only I hadn't done this.

𝗦𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗘𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝗟𝗮𝗶𝗻Where stories live. Discover now