PREFACE: There is a modern tragedy in which we group familial love, desire, and understanding under the singular label of love, when in reality, we should call this ultimate love something else entirely, which I will refer to as 'amore'.
To reinstate, there are two types of love: a familiar love, which one holds for friends and family. This familial love is based upon well-wishing for the other. I may refer to the familial love as simply 'love'. The other love, the all-encompassing love of soulmates, will be referred to as 'amore'. Amore consists of desire, understanding, and the familial love. To be in amore is to be in a state of romantic fulfillment. My theory of 'amore' aims to help those in a relationship understand which aspects of love are missing, so that they have a framework to work toward a more whole & complete love for each other.
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AMORE (romantic fulfillment) consists of:
•familial love: pure intentions for your partner
•understanding: depth of mind equal to that of your partner
•desire: attraction & full acceptance of your partner as an extension of you
• • •
AMORE
Understanding = MIND
Love = SPIRIT
Desire = BODY
• • •
It turns out that beyond interpersonal love, there may be other factors of attraction. Social status, sociability, and wealth are societal factors of love dealing not with how a person interracts with their significant other, but how they operate within the world around them.
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DEFINITIONS of love where only parts of AMORE are achieved [understanding, love, desire]:
NPC Love: One can love you, but not understand you.
Toxic Love: One can understand you, but not love you in the slightest. They may aim to manipulate you.
Pervish Love: One can desire you, but may not harbor any love for you.
Spiritual Love: One can love your soul, but may not desire you.
Philosopher's Love: One can understand you, but may not desire you.
Matchstick Love: One can desire you, but may not be able to understand who you are in the slightest.
• • •
One can understand you, but not love nor desire you.
We represent a part of these people which they do not like.
One can love you, but not understand nor desire you.
We represent a part of these people which they would like to grow within themselves.
One can desire you, but not love nor understand you.
We represent the object of their desire, but the faucet we represent is not wished to be grown.
One can love you, but not desire nor understand you.
We represent a part of these people which they would like to keep entertaining about themselves.
One can desire and love you, but not understand you.
These are our short-term relationships, which end once we realize we are not understood.
One can understand and desire you, but not love you.
These are our situationships, which end when we realize we are not in the arms of love.
One can love and understand you, but not desire you.
These are our best friends, with whom there is no deficiency, for a human merely needs to be understood and loved.
One can desire, love, and understand you.
This is our soul mate.
• • •
Deadliest & Most Pitiful Types of Love:
The most deadly of these, however, is to be understood and desired by a partner, but not to be loved by the one who understands. The spouse whom suffers from this arrangement suffers heavily, for they are known from the inside-out, and are deemed unlovable by the one they hold dear. To be in a one-sided relationship is the closest we can get to Hades on Earth.
The most pitiful of these, however, is to be loved by a partner, but not to be understood nor desired. Such shallow understanding robs love of most of its joys, the joys of connection, and love only for love's sake is pitying to the partner who needs desperately to be understood, but is not.
Ironic, how the most deadly love is the one where the familial love is not present, yet the most pitiful love is the one where only the familial love is present. Thus, familial love, the well-wishing upon the other, is the most important aspect of amore.
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APPLICATION TO REAL-LIFE:
If you are in a relationship, but one of the three aspects of AMORE is missing, tragedy may occur. Here are signs your relationship is unfulfilling:
There is love and understanding, but no desire.
-May have no tension/attraction
-May be cheated on
-May be unstimulating
There is desire and understanding, but no love.
-May be manipulated frequently
-May be talked down to
There is love and desire, but no understanding.
-May be unable to hold conversation
-May be boring
-May be no connection
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THE STRANGER'S DESIRE
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