Jake X jasper: broken brocode

Part one: jaspers revelation

[writers note: Not lore accurate!!! Jake Dillon and jasper aldrige's actions in this fan fiction may not be accurate to how they would act irl! Thanks :)

TW: mentions of homophobia, nazis, skibidi toilet, forced marriage, Kevin leonardo, brief mentions of domestic violence and slurs. If any will trigger you ⚠️DONT READ⚠️ and don't blame me if you do read it because I warned you pookie bear 😘

Hope you enjoy :)))

Jasper had always hated gay people. He thought they were disgusting, vile creatures. He often watched Ru Paul's drag race just to throw used toilet paper at the tv. In the year 2024, he still scowled and slurred at every gay person he saw. which is why, when his dearest mother informed him that he was to be wed to one of these said queer folks, he was distraught.

"WHAT!?!" Jasper screeched, "I AM NOT MARRYING A BENT BLOKE!!"

"Ermmmm... actually 🤓☝️" his said in a neek voice, "according to my calculations, you will be married to Jake. and that's final, Jasper."

"Nuh uh" Jasper tried to argue.
"Yuh huh" his father retaliated.
"Nuh uh"
"Yuh huh"
"Nuh uh"
"Yuh huh"

"BOYS! Stop arguing my lovelies 🥰 queen jiafei would NOT approve of your negativity 😡 she supports the skittle squad🥰🥰🥰" Jaspers mother, Rebecca, said in a very Tik Tok fashion.

"Rebecca my love, shut the fuck up you're literally stuck in 2020. floptropica is NOT Real place and you're just being annoying this is why I hit you and why Jasper will put you in a Shite nursing home." Rebecca's husband snapped angrily.
Rebecca stayed quiet as she didn't want her husband to fetch the belt.

"Alright anyway..." jasper said, with emphasis on the 'ay',"Dad I ain't marrying this guy whoever he his if he's bent ion want hi-"
Suddenly, a man with short blonde hair and ocean blue orbs entered the room and jaspers eyes widened. Jasper felt like he was in love, seeing this man through his eyes was like having an eye orgasm. Through any other persons eyes, you'd think you were looking at a greasy hobo, but Jasper saw him as a Pulchritudinous enigma.
Not in a gay way though, of course.
But who could this mystery man be? Jasper wondered.

"PERIOD!!!" The mystery man shouted in a girly pop tone, and jaspers expression dropped. So THIS is the fruity pebble he's engaged too? He supposed it's not the worst man he could be marrying, even if he is a MAN. Jasper had always been more of a meat cave guy himself, (although he'd had some urges when he saw that one recent calvin klein advert (ifykyk)) but if he was going to be forced into being a member of the skittle squad, this guy wasn't the WORST person to end up with. then again, the man's wearing bright pink crocks soooo... he might have to rethink.
"OH EM GEE HEY BOOOOO! 😘" jake says as he struts over to where Jasper is standing. Jasper can't breathe, his chest tightening at the sight of the man before him and the ever decreasing proximity between them.
"H-h-hello..." Jasper stutters. He feels like an idiot because hes speaking like nervous wreck.

"hello my sexy soon-to-be hubby~" Jake says seductively, "I'm Jake if you didn't already know, baby girl, I'm gay/dreamsexual and I go by he/him/dream/dreamself/twinkatronself prounouns!! Please respect said pronouns >.< what are you prounouns? Or do you just go by mine/mineself 😉" Jake say's flirtatiously.

Jasper turns a bright shade of crimson red like a gorgeous sunset, before pulling himself together and clearing his throat.
"I don't do any of that pronoun crap! I go by HE/HIM/ALPHAMALE PRONOUNS!!! RAHHHHH! AWOOOOO!" Jaspers extreme masculinity is seeping out of him, and Jake finds it extremely smexy.
"I bet I can change that 😏 I'll make you the gayest pookie alive, my darling..." Jake runs one of his boney fingers down jaspers chest.
Jasper starts to blush again.
No, no, this can't be happening?! Jasper ISNT gay! He knows he's not gay! So why is this random little twink having such an effect on him!?! Jasper takes a step back, away from Jake and whatever effect this man is having on him. He is disgusted with himself.
"N-N-NO!" Jasper screams in a panicked tone,  as he kneels before his poster of Andrew Tate and begins to sob, "I HAVE FAILED YOU, MY MENTOR! I LISTENED TO ALL YOUR SHITTY MALE PODCASTS AND I STILL FAILED YOU!".
Jake frowns and his eyes soften at this sight. He kneels down next to Jasper and pulls him into his arms, and jasper, being as distraught As he is, embraced the touch.