Kiss The Rain

• Chapter 5: The Bestfriend

Sachee's POV

Do Kyungsoo was a memory I buried deep in the past. I never expected he'll come and find me. I haven't heard of him in two years and now he pops out of nowhere and tells me he 'misses me'? He's really bizzaire most of the time. Sometimes his way of thinking is unpredictable and his thought's are unreadable. His emotions arent always true and his eyes always seems to hide something I dont know.

"Is it good?" he asked me with ears perked up. I was tasting his kimchi spaghetti.

I chewed the food then smiled. I raised a thumb. He smiled oh-so-expansively that it made his mouth shaped like heart.

It's good like it always was Kyungsoo.

I wrote then passed it to him. His expression changed. His smiled turned into a frown.

"you still havent move on?" I look at him. He was now seriously looking straight into my eyes.

I bit my lower lip. He surely is my bestfriend...he know's. He sees it. He says what I cant admit.

"Sachee, how many time's have we talked about this? this is torture." He said, his eyes full of pain and pity.

Soo, I deserve torture after everything. He died because of me.

"NO. He died because he choose to die. He died because he wanted you to live and continue your life, happy. Not like this. He did not die just to watch you live in hell!" he said raising the volume of his voice. Kyungsoo was the type of guy who wouldnt just raise his voice unless needed.I can tell that he is really dissapointed in me.  I'm sorry Kyungsoo.

"Sachee, Jong In is my friend too. But you, your my bestfriend Sachee, your one of the strongest person I know, I've expected more from you." He said trying to calm down.I know. He's right. But I cant help it. Jong In means the world to me and loosing him hurts alot. 

You raised your expectations to much, I'm not that strong.

"stop this foolishness Sachee. Wake up. Move on. He's dead, he's never coming back" His voice was like venom spreading through my body. Every word. Every sentence...hurts. It leaves a wound in my heart that only Jong In can heal.

What do I do if the only person who can stop me from doing this is the same reason I started doing this? 

"what more have you done to yourself? what torture have you made yourself feel?!" He said coldly. His voice was full of threat and authority. I quickly hid my hands. Thankgoodness the mark on my neck was gone.

"let me see your hands..."  he said then led his hands as if borrowing my hands from me. Am I that easy to read? "your hands Sachee."

I sighed then led my shaking hands to him. He looked at me before looking at it. He carefully lifted the sleeve covering my wounded wrist.

"ohmygod. Sachee what have you done to yourself?" He's said mouth hangging open.

I've been trying to be with Jong In that's all...

"This is madness. Sachee Shin, you will not do this to yourself ever again. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!" He said looking straightly into my eyes. I just blinked at him...

We can never tell Soo. I'm not myself when my emotions take over and eat me whole. I'm so gullible when it comes to my emotions Kyungsoo, I know you know that.

He looked at me with disbelief after he read my reply. He sighed, pushed his hair back frustratedly before standing up. "your unbelievable Sachee" Kyungsoo said before giving me one last look at shaking his head.

"I'm going for a walk. Stay here and wait until I comeback okay?" He said before walking out of the door.

This is one of the reasons why I didnt want Kyungsoo with me. He'll witness the hell I've been living in.

 Kyungsoo's POV

Once I closed the door to Sachee's apartment I leaned my back on the door. Jong In...look what you did. Shes now suffering, how could you bro? you've already made her suffer when you were still alive...cant you just make her happy now? Why do you always have to make her suffer? What did she do wrong to you? She loved you...alot. She loved you even though you were pushing her away. Why did she even love you?

Do Kyungsoo you're one big fool. You thought this will happen already but what did you do? You let her. But...you love her right? And if you love someone you'll set them free and let them do what makes them happy right? but...this doesnt make her happy, it makes her more miserable.

She's caging herself in a past she can never undo. Jong In is gone...nothing is going to change that.

Sachee Shin...you need to comeback...you need to move on.

She's not my bestfriend anymore. She smiles but not as radiat as the smile I fell for. She still shines but her light is slowly fading away. Slowly fading away like Jong In's memories. She's dying with it and I need to stop that from happening.

Jong In is my friend. I entrusted him with my life but he left it hangging. Now it's up to me to put all the broken pieces together. I need to keep her going.

Ohgod I wish I came earlier. I wish I watched over her. I wish...I wish I never let her go. I wish she knew what I feel. I wish she knew that eventhough Jong In is gone I'm here for her. Not as anybody but as her bestfriend. The bestfriend who always loved her.

I sighed. I need a walk, really.

I was about to go down the stairs when I saw someone going up.

I looked at that person. I’m sure I saw him before but I cant remember where or when.

I hid behind a plant. He walked up and went the opposite way.

I sighed with my eyes closed. I was relieved he didn’t see me creeping around and looking at him, he might think I’m crazy.

I opened my eyes then it got bigger than usual. I mean my eyes are alrady big but it became bigger with what I saw.

I saw the guy talking to Sachee. Sachee wasn’t speaking as usual but the guy talks to her like he knows her.

She’s friend’s with him? I felt kinda relieved that someone is friends with Sachee but I cant help having this feeling that, that guy, the one talking to Sachee now, is nothing but trouble.

She smiles a bit and nods to the guy. After about 3 to 4 minutes of talking, Sachee now steps back and closes the door with a wave.

When the door is closed the guy turns around to enter the opposite door of Sachee’s apartment. So their neighbors?

I stood up then started walking. I was about to go down the stairs when something stopped me. I decided to walk towards the door where the guy entered. I sighed. Who could you be?

I bit my lip then hesitantly pressed my ear on the door. I heard the guy talking

“yes…I don’t think so… She’s is my friend now, hahaha, she’s just as naïve as you told me...okay, I wont let her anywhere near him…it’s okay I’ll take care of this…okay I’ll hang up now, bye.”

Who is he talking about?

Wait....wth am I doing here? Do Kyungsoo you really are out of your mind.

I sighed…it’s non of my business anyway.