Enemies to Lovers || mlm shitpost

Chapter 3: Dr. DoodleWhacker

Isaac knocked on the nurse's office door. He waited patiently, then knocked again. He got impatient and barged in, dropping the shit bag that was known as Harvey onto the floor; his boxers squelched loudly and more shit escaped the floodgates.

The nurse appeared and smiled, "turn that frown upside down because Dr. DoodleWhacker is in town," he said cheerfully. Dr. DoodleWhacker looks really weird. His face is all lopsided, with one eye bigger than the other and a big, bumpy nose. His hair is a total mess, with different colors and textures all over the place, making him look really untidy. He wears some really fucking weird shit, like socks that look like they were used as cum socks, a tie that is all fucked up, and clothes with big, cum and shit stains. Perhaps some discharge too. It's like he's wearing a mix of old-fashioned clothes that he must've worn while having an orgy, making him look fugly.

 Harvey was too busy tweaking; twitching on the floor like a bug after you rain fucking hell on it. Each twitch caused at least another millimeter of bloody shit to spill out of his rectum.

Dr. DoodleWhacker gave the tweaking lad an odd look; a mix of disgust, concern and a poor attempt at feigning happiness. Isaac, on the other hand, fell to the floor; his back having suffered major trauma from having to carry a poo rag (Harvey) on his back. A very heavy poo rag.

Dr. DoodleWhacker picked up Isaac and snapped his spine into place. Isaac squealed a bit, and got embarrassed. Isaac stared into Dr. DoodleWhacker's soulless eyes. They looked like beetles; as if someone replaced his eyes with two Dynastinae beetles.

"Thanks..." Isaac said awkwardly, his legs wriggling slightly as he dangled in Dr. DoodleWhacker's grip. The Doctor smiled, and placed Isaac on a chair. He then glanced at the shit stain on the floor (Harvey) and gripped him by the collar, dragging him away to get cleaned up.

Meanwhile, Dr. DoodleWhacker was cleaning up Harvey, violently ripping Harvey's pants off, slipping his uncomfortably bony fingers along Harvey's prostate and scooping out lumps of shit in the fist full.

Suddenly, Dr. DoodleWhacker gets a phone call. He washed his hands and picked up his phone. "Ah! It's my missus. Give me a simmer, young lad!" Dr. DoodleWhacker said cheerfully with a smile before scurrying out the room. Harvey nodded slightly, and was left alone to his own shit stench.

After a short while, Dr. DoodleWhacker's muffled screaming and crying could be heard from a few rooms away. It sounded like he was begging his wife to stay? Was she leaving him? Harvey and Isaac were both so full of questions, Harvey mainly full of literal shit rather than questions about Dr. DoodleWhacker's marriage and mental health. 

Eventually, when the phone call presumably ended, Dr. DoodleWhacker returned to Harvey. "Sorry, my boy. I just ought to finish sumthin off, a'right?" *he said kindly before leaving Harvey alone again.

Isaac, who was in the waiting area of the Nurse's office, saw Dr. DoodleWhacker enter his office. Isaac didn't think much of this, and went back to minding his business. However, as time passed, Isaac didn't see Dr. DoodleWhacker exit his office. "Weird..." Isaac mumbled to himself, but didn't care all that much.

Harvey soon waddled out of the room he was in, wanting to check up on Dr. DoodleWhacker. Instead, he only saw Isaac.

"Where'd he go?" asked Harvey.
Isaac shrugged, "Dunno," he replied, "last saw him go into his office"
"Reckon we should check up on him?"
"Sure."

The two boys went into Dr. DoodleWhacker's office. It was dark; all the blinds were down and lights turned off. "It's as dark as a forest, I can't see shit!" Harvey complained. "That's a first," Isaac retorted, turning on the lights. Their expressions dropped, and the two were stunned into silence. There was Dr. DoodleWhacker, hanging from the ceiling with dental floss in the middle of the office.

"I think there's some guy hanging there..." Harvey whispered to Isaac as he prodded the body with his index finger, then taking out his phone to record Dr. DoodleWhacker's lifeless body. "I'm gonna show this to the school headmaster," he added, in which Isaac nodded in agreement.

(Word count: 706)