Identical

Part 4- Missing Pieces

April 1979

Sara

     We've been eating dinner in silence almost every night since Emily got kicked out. Even Geenie, who's seven now knows when to keep her mouth shut. Suddenly Mom pipes up. "Sara, why didn't you tell  me you had a steady?"

     I almost choke on my lasagna. "What?" I sputter. "What steady?"  I can feel my heart beat faster with each second it takes her to respond. I can tell she's stretching this out, making it as awkward for me as possible. "You know, a boyfriend.  Amber's mom said she saw you kissing some boy across from Walgreen's last night. I thought you might tell me who he is."

     I look over to Dad's empty chair. He's never home now, always choosing to spend his free time at the shop or down on Mason road where all the bars are. I can only imagine how he would react to this. "His name is Andrew, and he's very nice to me. Nothing's going on."

     Mom takes a sip of her wine. "Geenie go watch TV" she orders. Geenie does as she's told, quietly slinking out of her chair and shuffling to the living room. She turns to me. "You know the rules Sara Michelle. No dating until you are sixteen - just because your sister decided to disobey me doesn't mean you should either." I take notice in how she keeps saying me instead of us and we, as if she doesn't care that Dad's not in the picture much anymore.

      She leans over, practically whispering in my ear. "I don't want two knocked up daughters. You can either break up with him, or wait until your birthday to see him again." I roll my eyes at this. "Mom that's ridiculous. We go to school together and see each other every freakin' day. It's not going to work." As soon as I say this I can tell she's surprised that I talked back to her. That's usually Emily's job.

      Mom lights a cigarette, blowing the smoke up to the ceiling. "Can't you tell I'm doing this for your own good? People are already talking about Mrs. Garland, the woman who raised two sluts." I shook my head, pushing my chair back. "Who cares what strangers think-you should be talking to Emily. She's scared out of her mind about giving birth and raising a child in Stilton Alley. Why don't you just pick up the phone and-

"Stop" Mom put her hand up. "I don't need to hear this from you." She gathers the plates off the table and stacks them in the sink. "What would your father think?" 

I can't believe this. All these years I looked up to Mom as a pioneering figure-a rock star. She got a job before a lot of the other mothers on the block did, and always seemed to be speak her mind. I just can't wrap my head around the fact that she actually cares what Dad would approve of. 

"Dad's not even here!" I shout. "He is never here anymore. I don't understand why still care about his opinion anyways. If you want to talk to your kid than you should be able to!" This time I'm in Mom's face, watching her absentmindedly cleaned the counter top. "This family's falling apart." I whimper.

Emily

"Get up!" I hear Al pound on the door. "Y'all got your appointment today!" He keeps pounding on the door until Tommy gets up and opens it. "Alright, Dad! We're awake." Al peers in the room, taking a look around and finally settling on me.

      "Jesus, lil' girl! You're gettin' bigger and bigger every time I see you! Pretty soon you won't be able to fit into my overalls." Al laughs ferociously at this, once again sending himself into a coughing fit. Tommy looks back at me and rolls his eyes, as if it would make me forgive his father for being an ass. I just stare at him.

     We were supposed to be at the clinic by 10 but Al couldn't get the truck to start. We ended up borrowing the neighbors pick up, which wasn't big enough for all three of us to fit into the front. Tommy had to ride in the flatbed. When we got  there Al left for the bar next door, telling us to find him afterwards.