sʜᴀᴛᴛᴇʀᴇᴅ

N I N E T E E N

Alexa

Well, kind of.

I wasn't going to tell him how mean our step brothers were to me in the past. That's kind of irrelevant, and I didn't feel the need to open old wounds.

I did tell Andrew that I actually did try to Jill myself, my ex boyfriend kidnapped me for months, and i told him about Ryan and... what he did....

Andrew stayed silent, listening to every word. I was staring down at the ground as I spoke. I didn't want to look at him. I was embarrassed. But at the same time, I was glad to have been able to tell someone the complete truth, and I was glad that that someone was my twin brother.

When I was done, I waited for Andrew to say something, to say anything. And when he didn't immediately speak, I glanced up at him. His face was hardened and he was glaring. Not at me, no. It was as if he was glaring at thin air.

"Andy?" I said, timid. What was he thinking about?

"Lexi," Andrew said. "I'm trying to be calm, but I am going to kill them."

By them, I assumed he meant Benny and Ryan.

I hugged Andrew and tried not to cry. It felt so good to get it off my chest. It was like I was suffocating but now I am free. I don't even have to worry about Benny and Ryan anymore. I don't think, anyways. I hope they're both gone for good....

"Lexi, you have suffered so much," Andrew said, "but now that I am here, no one—and I mean no one—is going to hurt you ever again. I promise you, I will fucking protect you."

I stayed silent, just enjoying being able to enjoy my brother's hugs again. Two years is a long time to wait for someone to wake up. And I wasn't even here when he did wake up, something that will forever haunt my mind.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't there for you," Andrew says.

"Andy, it's not your fault," I tell him. "Please don't—don't apologize, okay?"

Andrew sighs and lets go.

I could hear Noah crying from his room and I crack a teary smile at Andrew. I could see the baby crying getting old pretty quickly.

"You know where Uncle Ryan lives. Tell me."

I pursed my lips. "Andy, you're emotional and he's a grown man, you can't—"

"Dad is a grown man too and I beat the bell outta him."

"I know, but—"

"What about Benny?" Andrew asked.

"I don't know," I tell him honestly. It was as if my brain was blocking vital information. Trauma, probably.

Plus, I didn't exactly see the way to Benny's house when he had kidnapped me, and when I ran away from him, I wasn't too concerned with trying to remember his location. I had barely any food in me. Back then, I was mainly running on adrenaline.

"Lexi, I vow to you that I will fucking kill him. And after I kill him, Ryan is next."

"Andy—"

"Don't Andy me! They both hurt my fucking sister and no one does that. The fact that they both just got away with what they've done to you..."

Andrew was seething and I didn't like seeing him so mad. He looked kind of like Dad, not that I would tell him that.

"Andy, murder isn't something you can come back from." I believed Andrew was serious about killing those two.

"They deserve it!"

"Andy...." I pause. "I'm not talking about whether or not they deserve to be killed. I'm—well, murder isn't something you can come back from. It will haunt you, eat you up inside. You'll regret it."

"I won't regret killing the people that hurt my sister."

"You say that now, when you're so mad... but you will regret it, Andy. I promise," I tell him.

I know my brother, and I know that murder will ruin him forever, and I don't want my brother to have to deal with the aftermath. Not for my sake. He's still so young. He'll be tainted after that.

I don't want him to be... He can still be happy, even if the actions of Dad, Ryan and Benny traumatized me to the point that I will never be truly happy again.

"Lexi—"

"Promise me you won't do anything reckless ever, not something like that." I looked at him with earnest. I don't doubt he would kill someone. I know my brother. He's being so honest, in the heat of his anger.

***

A week has gone by since the baby was born. Noah cries a lot, something everyone is annoyed with — especially Dad. I was worried that he'll hit the baby or something. So were my brothers. Luckily, Veronica was always with the baby and Dad would never do such a thing in front of her.

Blake's mom has also given birth to a baby girl. Honestly, I completely forgotten that his mom was pregnant too. Blake's baby sister is named Diana. Ryder was totally betting on Noah and Diana being best friends when they're older.

Dad is around, but he doesn't talk to anyone except Veronica. He leaves me alone, but is always shooting glares at everyone and his hands are always clenched, like he has built up rage that he can't unleash. I think he hasn't been abusive ever since Andrew beat the shit out of him.

Veronica is exhausted, because Dad is not helping with Noah. He just watches her do everything. Me and my brothers all help out though, to lighten Veronica's loads.

Michael, Elliot, Andrew, Jackson and I hang out regularly, having the time of our lives. Ryder, Ethan and Blake occasionally join us, but our groups are still separate. Recently, Blake and Andrew have been arguing. Not even playfully like Michael and Jackson. It's as if Andrew and Blake despise each other, and I didn't know why. Did Andrew find out how Blake used to bully me? I was too scared to ask. I don't think Andrew knew, though.

Anyway, life went on and things were good.

But like everything good, it has to come to an end eventually.