Beyond your Blues

Chapter Eight

I'm so sorry guys for being this late.sometimes shit happens🤷‍♀️please forgive me.

                                    ~~~~~~

"That day was the last time i saw Talay.somehow everything feels like a distant memory,though it only happened like a week ago.that was single handedly the worst experience of my life,its a relief that Talay's wound is not that deep but.I-I killed someone."

I ended,my breath leaving in a whoosh of air.and i thought back to all the events in sequence that's being pushed back by new ones.and the people around me?

"I felt the importance of my life that day,how thankful i am to have these people around me"every single word poured through the pores of my nerves like blood.
Uncle John waited patiently for me to go on.
It hurt my stomach when I shifted in my position to a more comfortable one.

"When i woke up,he was gone already and I'm not gonna lie,i at least expected a text from him.cause you know,after going through that kind of experience with him,my mind involuntarily formed a companionship with him and I'm a little hurt that he planned to act like it never happened"

When i paused for a break,he gave me a glass of water.and told me to take my time.
I'm only telling uncle all this because i know that all the information is confidential.meaning he wont tell my dad.i have been consulting him daily since i woke on the hospital bed attached to needles,with all my friends around but Talay no where to be found.which was four days back.and a long while since i went to college.

I need to get this weight down from my head,and the fact that Talay planned to abandon me after all that.

Placing the glass down on the nearest table,I continued closing my eyes,and the same feeling of dread that's been haunting me in my nightmares consumed me.

"That was really,really scary "i told him for the hundredth time.still in disbelief that i had gone through something like that.the first two days i cried and trembled but now i have become kind of numb.my mind is processing it better than i would have expected.

"It hurts here"i pointed to my neck.
"The doctors injected me with tt,cause they thought that those nails could contain infection and i guess it did,i saw decayed flesh stuck inside for god's sake"i chuckled,shuddering at that dreadful memory,wherein at that moment i thought would be my last breath.
I killed that psycho.
Oh my god,i killed him.
My hands trembled just thinking about that.
I'm going to hell,i think as i fist my hands.

"That is sure a very terrifying experience indeed"uncle nodded.
"That was"i muttered,sinking back into my chair.looking out the window i saw that it was evening already.i came here earlier than my scheduled appointment because I believed this place and the white walls and the weird painting would calm me and it did.

"what you are currently feeling for that boy,it's a trauma bond"he paused to see if I'm listening.
I nodded to assure him and he continued.
"So when two or more people experience a mental disturbance over something that mutually terrifies them,and these incidents are most likely unlike what you expect or experience in your daily life"he pointed."trauma as you might already know is what you are experiencing,and because you have experienced that with him,at that point trusting him,feeling protective of him and bonding with him,that"he paused
"is a trauma bond"completing patiently.he gave an encouraging smile.
"And so far you are processing it quite well.and for the matter that boy would be just as scared as you,hearing that he was the one who saw you loose conscious after something that disturbing,give him some time"he advised.

"Or he might just not care"i shrugged "he would've felt the same companionship as me and now that it's over it's just unnecessary for us to talk about it again "
"That Kaia,sadly"uncle pointed with his pen "might be a possibility too".