Wondering Spirits

Chapter 11: My Mother

My mom and Lillian are at each other's throats
'' I dare you just let yourself in, and begin to disrespect me in my own home! 'Lillian yells
''oh please Lillian'' mom rolls her eyes '' we both know this isn't your home, you're nothing but a girlfriend, you'll be gone as fast as you came''
''excuse you, I'm his fiancé, ''Lillian says, holding up her hand and showing off her huge diamond engagement ring
My mom scoffs '' you really think that means anything to him a ring never stopped him from cheating then, I doubt it would stop him now and If you don't mind I came here to see my daughter not argue with the whore, that wearing my old jewelry ''
'' What did you say! ''Lillian warns, stepping up to mom
''you heard me ''mom replies, dryly
''Mom?''. I speak out, and they both shut up and immediately turn to me ''what's going on?''
''Kandi '', she gasps, dropping her handbag on the floor and walking up to me and pulling me into her embrace. she has on a beige flowy suit, with black bold heels, silky mob wig and silver hoop earrings, and when she hugs me, she smells just like I remembered of sweet amber vanilla and channel No. 5
''what are you doing here '', I ask as she pulls away
''Aren't you happy to see me?'' she smiles, and the side of her eyes crinkle just like they always do. ''I came for you, I got so worried because you wouldn't pick up your phone and your dad was just giving me these dumb excuses and I just -I needed to see my baby '', she says hugging me again.
if anything, I am my mother's daughter. I have her big round dark brown eyes, her button nose, and her puffy checks, and her bow shaped lips and sometimes her attitude.
''oh'', is all I can say I'm completely taken aback. Mom is here in the flesh, and she came back for me? part of me wants to believe that, but the other doesn't really know how to feel. I haven't seen her since the divorce court hearing months ago.
''what happened to your contract in Tanzania?'' I ask her
'' I closed it a week ago, I decided I needed to take some time off work'', she places her hands on her hips, you would have known that if you actually picked up my calls''
I feel a span of guilt, and I don't know why, but I couldn't bring myself to talk to her. Just seeing her in person makes me realize why
I haven't forgiven her yet.
I shake my head ''Mom I-
''it's okay baby we'll have plenty of time to talk, I understand.'' she places her hand on my shoulder. '' This is what she always does when she comes back, she treats me like I'm still five years old, and plays best mom in the world before she meets a random rich guy in a hotel bar and leaves without any goodbyes.

''you know Maggie, maybe your daughter ignores your calls because you still treat her like child she's 18 she's a grown woman for god's sake, if she doesn't want to talk to you she doesn't want to talk to you'' mom turns to Lillian
''Look Lucy or whatever your name is'', Lillian rolls her eyes ''this is a conversation between me and my daughter and quite frankly I didn't ask for your opinion as a matter of fact you won't even be in her life much longer, who knows Michael might meet some other skank in the grocery store to replace you enjoy it while it lasts ''
'' You know what? I won't stoop myself so low arguing with a woman that couldn't keep her own family intact, at least I know how to keep a home ''
''what home?'' mom scoffs, folding her arms ''You mean this creepy old mansion located in one of the towns shittiest neighbourhoods? I almost didn't come here from fear of my car being jacked ''
'' You take that back or else ''Lillian's says gritting says, stepping up to my mom
''or else what? ''my mom's says calling her blush and crossing her arms. This is it they're going to kill each other.

''Maggie?'', Dad walks in his work suit and briefcase. He looks at my mom, then Lillian, then back, and then at my mom, his mouth gapes open. I'm clearly invisible in this room right now
''You're back? he says '' I-I didn't - you didn't call' 'He takes off his suit jacket '
''Save it, Mike '', Mom says, putting up her hand and cutting him off '' Spare me awkward, where have you been? I miss you crap. I only came here to see Kandi and tell you that she will be going back to Zanzibar with me '',
'' wait what'', Dad and I both say at the same time
She turns to me '' Kandi I have no idea why you won't pick up my calls, but I'm here now and I want us to go back to the way things we're between us and moving back with me will help us start afresh. This is not the first time I've had that line, but it is the first time she's offered to take me with her.
She then turns to my dad ''It's always somewhat good to see you mike''
''likewise, ''replies folding his arms
She then looks away facing the floor' 'Kandi is an adult know, so this will be her choice. I don't you or your crazy girlfriend influencing her decision ''. What is my decision?
''Michael are you hearing this?'' Lillian nags

'' Please don't call my fiancé names Maggie we've been through this. my mom rolls her eyes.
'' And also I trust Kandi will make the right choice '' Daddy says without barely looking at me. As though he already knows the choice I'll make, why would I leave the only good parent I know and go and live with a woman that decided to disappear for most of my child hood whenever she felt like it, the woman that caused my trust issues and left without a giving me reason.
''Good she says, grabbing her bag off the floor, '' I will be leaving now.'' I notice as she avoids looking my dad in the eye, and he does the same, keeping his to the ground as though there was an unspoken truce to them. Guilt maybe, betrayal or the loss of the first love that they both didn't quite recover from, either way my parents separated for a reason, and maybe looking each other in the eye would remind them both of a pain they're both trying to escape. That's why I'm not surprised that my mom heads straight for the door the moment he walks in. She's always been trying to get away from him.
'' Kandi baby, I'll call you soon. I just hope this time you'll pick up''
She then walks out, and I watch her drive out the gate, not in the car. Dad bought her but in a much newer and nicer one. All of a sudden, after she left it's like she was never here, or rather a dream, but one thing I know for sure is, the heaviness never left the room.

After having the most awkward dinner with my dad, who kept picking at his food with his fork and Lillian, who kept asking why he was so quiet at the table all night. He's clearly still in love with her. Hats my mother for you ladies and gentlemen she's a saint when she's sober and makes you feel like you're the only one that matters in the world and you remember why you hate her when she leaves
I head straight to the study. Somehow, my mom's unexpected visits affected the whole house, and Joyce who's on her day off wasn't here to break the ice. I needed to get back into my investigation and dump my new info onto my dream.
For the first time, I walk into the study, and the lights are off ''that's odd. I locate the switch, and the light flickered on beaming bright yellow through the room and highlighting the red carpet and pretty gold furniture. Not a sign of dream, he isn't by his usual spot by the window, and only yesterday's newspaper laid on the empty couch.
''Dream?'' I called out, walking around but not a single response, that's weird he's always in here. Had he gone out somewhere, but where he can't leave the house, maybe he's someone in the house and hidden place I don't know about I wouldn't be surprised, this place it twice the size of my old middle school building.
The piano that stood at the corner of the room was all covered up and tucked away in a drop cloth. What's going on? Despite never seeing him play, he always lingered and ran his fingers over the keys every once in a while, so much so I could tell he loved it. Why would he cover it up?
I sit down on the bench and slowly unzip the drop cloth and stare at the shiny keys. I always wished I knew how to play, but my parents always saw music as a waste of time.
I ran my fingers over the keys hearing each note, and until I pause at one, the note sounds off, and when I tap it again, it makes an odd sound. Maybe it isn't toned? I looked under the keys, obviously not knowing what I'm doing and catching sight of something under them it's gold. I reach my fingers under the key board, after a few minutes of struggle, I manage to pull out what looks like a gold key, a key hidden under a bunch of keys, How ironic.
I wonder what it unlocks? it has a symbol on it, one that I've seen around the house before but not quite paid attention to until now, but I can't quite put my finger on it. It had the symbol of an elephant head and two crossed spears behind it. some sort of tribal insignia.
I lay down on the carpet, trying to think, could it be a key to a safe, is there gold or diamonds hidden in the house somewhere? why would he hide a rusted old key? Is there a secret door somewhere? what could it be? I lay down on one of the fancy gold couches and I immediately suck I a breath once I look up, the same symbol is painted onto the roof of the study, I quickly lift up the key and it matches, not to mention there's a key shaped hole in the roof too. How coincidental is that.
I climb onto some of the cushions I stacked on the couch. Once I get close enough, I fit the key through the hole and then push up the wood ceiling board, and when it opens, a bunch of books fall out. Wait, books? Why would he hide books? I picked one up, and my disappointment quickly fades.
They 're not books but journals, I blow the dust off some of them, and they're all marked with different years .
1951,1952 1953.... up until this year
''Kandi! ''Daddy yells from the kitchen, and I startle nearly tumbling the books ''you're supposed to help with the dishes Joyce isn't here remember?''
''coming'', I yell back
I pick one up and stuff it under my shirt, then quickly close up the latch and put the keys back under the piano.

Later that night, I lay in bed staring at the journal wondering what is inside, who it belongs to, and why it's hidden away. I guess there's only one way to know. I opened the first page.

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