Life as a Leclerc

Chapter 9

After the weekend away I returned back to my working life. I said goodbye to Charles and Max.  Saying goodbye to Max so harder than saying goodbye to Charles. I told them that I would be okay and if I ever need help I will let them know. I got all of my things and headed to the airport. Charles ask if he can drop me off but I wanted to go by myself. He didn't like that the idea but agreed at the end. I got into the car and said goodbye to them. I have arrived to the airport and got into the jet.

After the flight, I went straight to the office. I ask Juls to meet me here. I really don't want her to ask me about the whole thing with my father anymore. Going into the office was weird, no one knew what happened and it should stay that way. I had to fake a smile as I walked into the office. I hate faking a smile it feels like I'm lying when I do. I got into my office and started to work. Knock knock I heard at the door. I look up and saw Juls. "Can I come in?" She said. I nodded and put my stuff to the side. "Are you okay?" she said coming in and taking a sit. I got up and closed the door. I didn't know what to say but we talked about it anyways. "I am so sorry that happened to you." She said getting close to me. "I don't want to talk about it anymore it does nothing. I just wish I would have hit him back." I started to get angry. "Ok Lor I get that you're mad but you need to clam down." She said I looked at her. "I am" I said. She nodded her head no and looked down. I looked down saw that I was grabbing my pencil so hard that I snapped in half. I let it go which made it fall to the floor. I look at Juls and stayed quiet. She picked them up and threw then away. "Maybe you should go have a chat with him and get it out of your system, you're not well to be here." She said "Should I right? I mean I will have to see him at one point again." She nods I get all of my stuff and headed out my office. "Loren?!" I can hear her say from across the room. I stopped as she was walking up to me. "Don't tell anyone where you're going, let this be something that you do by yourself and for yourself, I know that you are strong enough to do this. I will take care of everything here and keep you updated." I nod. "But what about Charles and Max? I should tell them? They should know, What if something happens?" "No they will just stop you and that's the last thing you want. This all started with you and him don't let them get in the way and have him take them away from you." She was right. If anything happens I don't want their name to be apart of this especially right now with F1 just starting. I nodded to her and walked away. I got into my car and headed to the airport again. When I arrived I called Brett. He told me that my father was at his house. I got into my car and race to his house. I quickly got out the car and headed inside without knocking. He wasn't in his office. I looked around everywhere. I finally found him. He was in the garage where he keeps all his cars. He was working on one when I saw him. He looked up. "Loren" He said putting down a part of the car and started to walk up to me. I stepped back making him stop. "Why?" all I said. He stayed quiet. "Loren I don't know. I can not tell you how sorry I am that I hurt you" "Stop lying Joe, you know that you have wanted to do that for the longest" He stayed silent "You're wrong Loren I never wanted to do that to you" "That's not what I meant, Why did you wait so long to do it? What? Because you promised Max you would never lay a hand on me?" He looked at me. "He told you didn't he?" I nodded. He smirked. Looked up and just started smiling. "Is that why you came here? Because you wanted to stand up for your idiot brother?" I stand tall. "Loren there is so much that your brother never told you" I stayed quiet. "That's Max alright, always making me look like the bad guy, the bad father to the both of you." "You were and you still are." "You're wrong on that part Loren" He said before getting his glass of whiskey. "The only reason that max and I made that promise wasn't because I wanted to hit you but because I saw the spark in you that I saw in max as well." I was confessed. "What do you mean?" "While I was pushing max to be the best and I wanted you to be like your mother, one of the best racers out there...Think about it, how good it would be to see both of your children be the best and win every race...two is better than one type of thing." I still stayed quiet "Max wanted to be the best, growing up he didn't want to share the spot light with you. You were better than him in everything. He was a failure. Could never keep up with you. So I told him that if he doesn't win then I will hurt you...he didn't believe me so I had to prove to him that I wasn't lying" "What did you do?" He took a sip of his drink. "Remember when you were riding the motor bike and the chain broke and you broke your arm?" "Yeah I remember, the chain broke because it was old- oh my god you broke the chain? I COULD HAVE DIED?" I said getting angry. "But you didn't and that was the only way I could get him to take me seriously. Which made him better and stronger than you. If it wasn't for that promise he wouldn't be where he is today." I didn't say anything but to look at him and think if I believe him or not. "You're lying, Max would never agree to that." He just looks at me. "Tell me something Loren...You would do anything and everything to help and protect your brother right?" I didn't say anything just looked at him with my watery eyes. "Don't you think he would do the same for you?" The more he was telling me, the more I started to believe him. He came closer to me. We were standing face to face at this point. "I would never physically hurt you Loren. But I knew that would make Max be better." At this point I was not just angry but upset at myself. I thought me being here for Max was helping him but never thought it would get to this. "You know Joe you say all of this because you hit me. What makes you think I believe every word that comes out of your mouth?" He smirks. "Don't believe me I see?...That's fine. Why don't you go running to your brother like you always do little girl and ask him yoursel-" I didn't let him finish. I just punched him across the face. I didn't think I hit him that hard but he fell to the floor. Making him drop his drink all over. Laying on the floor he looks up at me.  I look straight into his eyes. Getting close to him making sure he hears me clearly. "Let me make myself clear...You haven't been a father to me for a long ass fucking time. So don't start acting like one. You mean nothing to me, you hit me and now we're even. If you ever try to get into me and my family trust me you will pay. You may have started who I am but I'm the one that made me better and stronger than you ever were. Don't you ever fucking forget that got?" He nods. I get away from him and walked out. I walked out of the house and got into my car and left. I didn't cry, I felt proud of myself. I should have done that in the beginning.

After a while, I came back to Paris. I didn't have a place to stay for the night. I barely was in Paris for a day and back home for half a day. I believe I spent more time in the air than on ground. I haven't eaten anything either. I decided to get a room in Paris to be close to the office and have a little space to collect myself for a bit. I also decided to call Max and talk to him about everything that happened. I didn't want to because I knew that he was going to get mad at me for going back to his house alone. But I knew I had to get his side of what Joe said.

(M~Max & L~Loren)

M: Hey Lor is everything alright?
L: Hey max yeah everything is fine, just in my room relaxing after a long day.
M: That's good.
I stayed quiet for a second trying to figure out my words on how to tell him.
M: Loren are you sure everything is good? You look like you have been crying.

I looked away for a second to check myself in the mirror.

L: What? Yeah I'm fine. No I just had a lot on my mind and I've been thinking about it that's all.
M: Lor I know you like the back of my hand. What's up?

I stayed quiet again

L: Something happened and first I don't want you to get mad or anything just know that I did it for you and me.
M: What did you do?

I told him that I went to go see Joe. He started to yell at me though the phone. There were points while he was talking I kinda zoned out thinking that I made a mistake on going. But it had to be done.

M: Lor how could you do that? he could have hurt you again or worst? What made you think that was okay for you to do by yourself?
L: I need to know Max
M: Know what?
L: Why in the hell would you make a promise like that with him?
M: Loren I told you why. To protect you from him
L: He told me that he wanted you to be the best but you could never be better than me.
M: Better than you? Loren what are you even talking about?
L: He told me that growing up I was better than you. IN EVERYTHING! I could have followed my dream of being right beside you winning every race. That you were a failure and the only way you can be better is if he threaten you to hurt me if you didn't work harder.
M: You're joking right? You're actually believing every word of what that idiot said to you?
L: Why didn't you tell me? that's what I'm wondering?
M: Everything he told you was a lie Loren. He's trying to get in your head don't let him.
L: HE BROKE MY ARM MAX FOR YOU!!! HE MADE SURE THAT YOU WERE GOING TO BE THE BEST. IF IT WASN'T FOR HIM, YOU WOULDN'T BE WHERE YOU ARE KNOW?
M: Loren you need to clam down. You broke your arm because the chain was old and it snapped.

At this point I just started to scream at the top of my lungs at him. I didn't know who to believe now. I don't know why I'm believing Joe over Max. I kept fighting with Max over everything to the point were my vision was getting blurry. I got lightheaded and could barely hear Max every time he was talking.

M: Loren He's crazy. All he's trying to do is get in your hea-...Loren are you alright? You don't look so good?
L: I'm fine Max I just need to get some water.

I said getting up. The room was spinning so much.

M: Loren take a seat. LOREN!?! LOREN!?!?

Is the last thing I hear him say before everything went dark.