If I Knew

New Day, New Me

CONTENT WARNING

I want to inform you guys that I'm a young student and that this narrative might have a few grammar mistakes. This is the first time I'm writing a story, so I can confirm that it isn't written in a professional manner.

The story contains sexual content, vulgar language and might be unpleasing to read for people who are easily triggered.

Everything was written from my imagination and it is a completely original idea. This is a collaboration with the amazing @marauau1.
                       
                                  PLAYLIST

If I Knew - Bruno Mars
The Hills - The Weeknd
Kiss Land - The Weeknd
What You Need - The Weeknd
Die For You - The Weeknd ft. Ariana Grande
Let Me Love You - Ariana Grande
Do I Wanna Know - Arctic Monkeys
Obsessed - Mariah Carey
Do Re Mi - Blackbear
Bathroom - Montell Fish
Breakin' Dishes - Rihanna

                   Have a good time reading!

Meredith ᯓ★

Here I am, changing towns for my future education.
Feels like it's the millionth time of trying to find a place to truly feel like home, a place to feel safe and accepted.
Each time I move makes me feel hopeless and empty. Never in my life have I felt welcomed, never had a true, lasting friendship, never wanted to leave my room. It's just me and my thoughts. It's always been this way.
It felt like a thunderstorm had been taking over my mind, flooding my brain with negative thoughts. The only solution of draining them was to read. Reading has always been my therapy. Romance books have always been my thing.
The way the characters talk about each other, the connection between them and the way they would do anything to just be by their sides, makes me wish I could experience this real, true love. I wish to find a boy who I can call "mine", who I can truly name " my one and only", to help me escape reality.
But I don't have faith.

7 A.M, Florence

Slow and deep breaths escape my mouth as I try to fall asleep. After 3 hours of rest I finally wake up. Dizzy vision and messy hair that could easily resemble as a bird nest. Staring at the ceiling, a drop of motivation fills my brain with a piece of advice.

I need  a change.
I need to change.

And this "change" needs to happen today.
I put on my favorite dress — a beautiful off shoulder white dress with crystal blue floral details — and my favorite pair of shoes — a black pair of converse — I take my hair out of my messy bun and run my fingers through my silky, long brown hair trying to fix it.
I grab my backpack and run down the stairs to eat breakfast. I almost fall down from these stupid, slippery and narrow wooden steps. I have to hurry up, because I can't be late on my first day of school. I quickly grab a bagel from the kitchen desk where my mom is standing.
Suddenly, I hear her voice saying:

"Morning honey, why are you in such a rush?"

"I'm running late. Love you, mom!"
I reply out of breath.

I quickly storm out of the house and hear my mom's voice once again.
"Love you too, honey! Have fun."