The Alphabet Makes Words. (Muke AU)

stupid now, drew monson. xx

"someone says i'm screaming when i'm not

reminds me that perceiving is all we've got.

this parking lot is beautiful tonight

and your the one that realized in my life

don't care if I look stupid now."

luke,

do you ever wonder what it would be like if we had never met? it's always a mind boggling thing when we play kicky bag with the universe's what if's and theoretical scenarios in which your sole reason for existing, does not.

if i didn't have you, i would probably be dead.

you're my lifeline and i'll never stop clinging to you. i never want to let go but sometimes i feel like i should. i feel like you deserve the world and maybe i'm not everything you need. you're larger than life luke, i don't think the ocean would be enough to cover what i feel for you.

i think the only reason i manage when i'm not with you is because every moment i spend with you; it's like a constant video roll and i manage to replay the most intimate of emotion in every way i feel i can and the concept of emotion almost isn't real. at the same time it's all we've got.

what we feel is quite literally the closest thing to heaven or hell. it's the closest thing we'll ever achieve that would be at all in sync with what every human being works for their entire life by doing things they think justifies right and wrong, good and bad, and themselves as people.

when you smile, you're the physical embodiment of heaven and i know i said i wasn't much of an afterlife person; but if this is what i'm in for- emotion is all i have.

don't ever feel bad you feel more deeply than other people lucifer.

luke- you're everything I've ever wanted. everything I've ever needed; and i hope i can come even moderately close to what you need too.

i love you.

love,

michael. xx

"drive no where for no reason in this town

'cause that's the only reason we've all found

pull over move your body as you should

always relive the moment if i could

don't care if I look stupid now"