Allora Affetto

F O U R T E E N

𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘢 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘷𝘦, 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺.

(This is unedited and extremely long haha)

♥️

T H E    D A Y    W H E N    T H E    R A I N
F I N A L L Y    S T O P P E D

Time.

I needed more time.

That was it.

I never intended to question Zack's love for me, of mine to his, I just needed time.

I had fought so much for us, that I was drained. I needed him to fight for me and he did, he always did.

So while I knew that I fuc*ed up things, I decided to take my time before going back to Zack without questioning my own sanity and blaming myself for everything.

I loved my babies, yes. I wish I could've given them a better life, also yes. I'm happy about the decision I took and needed to come to terms with it.

I'd rather they had a happy life than a life where I would blame them for tainting me. I didn't want to be a bad parent, what kind of a parent would an emotionally unstable me become?

I loved kids, Zack and I often spoke of adopting while having our own. I know he would've supported me regardless or what decision I took if he knew, but I needed to do it on own.

I needed to not feel disgusting in my own skin.

I needed to feel close to Zack, both emotionally and physically unlike how things had been after he came around again.

I was holding back then, and it was making me bitter so bitter that I dared to spew absolute bull*hit at the one man who stood behind me in my toughest times.

And while it was selfish of me to leave him broken, I needed to put myself together before going back to him.

Finally.

If he still wants me.

It had been one week since our last confrontation and true to his words, Zack had exited like he was never there in the picture to begin with.

I decided to wait back until today, now that the project was in full force, the entire team had to o visit the site and stay at the hotel near by for a two day trip.

Zack's hotel, to be clear.

I still had my icks, certain things still ticked me off but I was healing, slowly, with time.

But with Zack, I'd be fine like I always was.

Even if I have to beg for him, I would because he was it for me.

"Ma'am, we've reached the airport." My driver said, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I nodded as the driver got out and passed my bags to my security team while I digged into my bag, smiling once I finally found what I was looking for.

I swiftly got out of the car with the envelope griped tightly in my hands.

"Have a good trip, ma'am." Jai, my driver wished and bowed.

Jai was an immigrant who had unfortunately lost his family to a house fire, he had been by my side for quite a few years now, even on the day that things got dark, he was there.

I had given him a leave that day because it was his grand daughter's 3rd birthday and yet, upon realising that he couldn't reach me via call he had come looking after. Taking me to the hospital, never asking me what had happened even though questions floated in his head.