Redemption l.r.h.

9

LUKE

I inhale a deep breath as the sounds of an iPhone alarm breaks through the silence of the hotel room. The morning light had slipped its way inside and I immediately regret opening my eyes. My hand moves around the nightstand next to my side of the bed looking for my phone. Once I have possession of it, I repeatedly tap the screen in hopes of turning the annoying sound off. Silence fills the room again as I lay back down on the bed. Any sleep I was feeling had left my body the second it was scared awake by the alarm.

My vision is blurry as I take note of the time: 7:45. It's too damn early for anyone to be awake right now. I attempted to fall asleep at a decent time last night, but had I known Frankie would keep me up longer than I would've liked, I would've made her Cal's problem.

I blink repeatedly trying to allow my body to wake up. I paint patterns across the ceiling as Frankie's faint breathing echoes between our bodies. After she crawled into the bed, I curled up on my side in an attempt to stay as far apart from her as possible. I fell asleep before her but hearing her shallow breath let me know that she at some point had settled down and shut her eyes for the night.

I understand her being an insomniac myself. She didn't have to explain herself once I realized she was wide awake on the floor. It did pique my curiosity though. Insomnia normally stems from other issues. But we were in no position to ask each other about our problems. I had a laundry list.

As a child, I would hear my parents arguing over whatever they could. Mum's constant control over Dad. Dad's countless affairs that Mum tried to look past. The fact that Dad was abusive towards his own child. Even on the nights when they weren't fighting memories (more like nightmares) of Dad would play like a horror movie in my mind. I was strapped down to the chair with no way out.

The insomniac tendencies never went away even when I left home and traveled. Our shows normally finish around 11 at night. I was always last to shower since I took the longest and by the time I was done, it would be nearing 1 in the morning. I wasn't motion sick or anything, but between the bumpy roads, the sounds of three other sleeping boys, and my own incriminating thoughts sleep was the last thing on my mind.

When we arrived at our next venue, my body only had a few hours of rest. The day of shows were constant states of go, go, go and there was rarely a time for me to sleep. At 9:30 we'd have a band breakfast. A half an hour later, we'd have our training session to make sure our bodies were in prime condition for the elements that came with being in a band. Couldn't be gasping for air while singing or jumping around on stage.

Soundcheck was around noon and would last about an hour before we had a few hours of downtime before our fan experiences. I loved having those intimate moments with our fans and if we could I'd have all of them there for that. During the time between, I would take the best two-hour power nap of my life. I'd always wake up right before our scheduled time for our fan-included soundcheck which would result in us being late on stage. It was worth it though.

I attempt to lift myself and make my way downstairs before anyone came knocking on the door, but something on my chest prevents me from making an inch off the mattress. My gaze falls from the ceiling and moves towards Frankie's head on my stomach. Her lips are curled upwards as her grip on my waist tightens as I barely move my hips. I thank whatever higher power there is that I had multiple layers of clothing on to conceal my slight semi.

There was no way Frankie could get me hard. I've known her for over half my life and not once have I thought about touching her in that way. Even with her long brown curls that would look good around my hand, her thick thighs wrapped around my waist, or her pink lips wrapped around my- no.