Breaking Free | Natasha x OC

Chapter Thirty-Seven

"I wish you could see yourself through my eyes."
____

Natara scrolled past the Article titled: The Avengers: How close are they really?

She ignored almost all of those kinds of stories. She remembered the amount of times she'd started reading one and it had turned into a romance conspiracy. Almost always involving her wife and Steve. Or several with Bucky Barnes and a few scattering ones here and there with the other guys.

Those kinds of articles hadn't made many appearances over the past year but Natara still refused to read any more on principle. It seemed her wife was rumored to be dating everyone except the woman she'd married.

Tara herself had seen lots of rumors of her and Thor. She couldn't lie, she was proud to be shipped with a God. Especially one who looked as pretty as the blonde Asgardian...
What Natara didn't mind were the occasional edits of her wife, and the ones of her. Some were really good; most were meh. She wouldn't mind if those grew in popularity over the years.

Letting out a sigh, Natara tossed her phone aside and leant back into the couch. She gently played with her gold necklace, fingers fiddling with it carefully, tracing over the N initial.

She tried so, so hard not to think of Natasha... and most of the time she didn't. She kept herself so busy that it was easy not to, and in fairness, she was genuinely busy. Like ridiculously so.

Gods, her wife. Her beautiful, perfect wife. Natara hated the fact that she was the person Natasha wanted. The blonde Avenger deserved so much more than that. Than her.

Tara remembered the way Natasha would bring her a cup of tea, every single morning, before she'd even opened her eyes so that when she did, the blonde would be beside her when she woke; knowing Natara had gotten used to having some to wake up to.

She knew the way Nat distanced herself every time she was upset or in a mood to avoid having Natara get hurt by it, to always try make her happy- even when the blonde herself wasn't.

Tara could recall the stupid little grin Natasha would fight every time Natara herself was being hard headed, stubborn, and just generally argumentative. Apparently her wife found it amusing.

Gods, Natara remembered the things Natasha would say, in the most unexpected moments, the raw and emotional words she voice randomly...

It wasn't fair, that Natasha was everything no one else could possibly manage to be. Was so perfect and inherently selfless; so flawless... and yet had married a selfish partner.
Tara hated that more than anything. That by saving herself and saving these people, she was letting Natasha down.

Natasha Romanoff was the most perfect human being she'd ever laid eyes on. Had ever met. And yet Natasha had married her. How fucked up was that? How unfair it was.

While a large part of Natara knew Natasha would suffer in her absence, another part of her also thought it was for the best.
Nat had so much happening, so much still on her plate, Tara didn't think she needed her problems as well.

Natasha didn't need an ex-addict wife telling her her problems when the blonde had her own too. Didn't need to know how much the redhead struggled not to do something stupid.

Yes, Natara was selfish. She knew that. But at least leaving was one selfish thing. Because if she'd stayed at the compound it would've meant being selfish everyday.
Burdening Natasha with her problems while her wife had her own, occasionally snapping at her because Tara herself was upset... and just being a reminder of how far their relationship had fallen... see, now that was a dozen selfish acts everyday.

So Natara chose the best option in the long run, she was selfless enough for at least that.

Car tires were heard on the driveway, gravel under the weight of machinery, and so Natara stood up. Lilah would be here, she came out herself each time Natara handed over the kids.

The redhead had been at this for two months now and had seen things and lived things she'd tried to forget. But it was making her feel less guilty for having survived... twice. First time being the situation she was helping them out of now and the second time being after Thanos; because at least now she was doing something with her freedom. By doing something she could say she'd earned the right to her freedom to begin with. The right to have survived.

"C'mon, you two," Natara spoke gently and winced when the kids flinched.
These were two young boys, clearly severely traumatized. She looked them over, pain in her gaze. These two were clearly queer in some way, boys who fell on that spectrum had higher chances of being targeted.

They didn't speak and she knew why. Lilah has also brought her in for a more specialized training now that she was doing this. Teaching her a lot more of what to look for and what to know.
Natara had lived through it, yes, but not every situation was like hers had been. Most weren't; and not everyone would react the same way she had.

Some of the time, the people being trafficked would look to their trafficker to speak on their behalf and could be unresponsive to attempts where others tried to communicate with them on their own. These two boys fell on that side of things.

Lilah walked in with two others and they all greeted one another quietly. They'd all gotten familiar by now.

Once the two boys were being herded into the car, Lilah turned to look at Natara.
She was slightly shorter than the redhead, her hair long and dark and her eyes wide with gentle brown irises.

She had wide lips and a beauty mark in the upper left hand corner of her mouth. Her eyebrows were thick and dark, shaped immaculately with a slit through the right one.
Small golden hoops shone through from her lobes, spotted through the stray pieces of hair that had escaped its ponytail.

"The work you're doing, Natara, it's... incredible," Lilah urged. "You're changing the whole game from our side of things. I know I say it every time but I truly can't express how much I mean it, thank you."

Natara looked away, drinking a glass of water to distract herself. She didn't need compliments when it came to this... and to be perfectly honest, she didn't feel really deserving of any since these last few months.
"How's Kiera?" She asked instead.

Lilah nodded at the question, eyes moving as her brain worked. "She's getting there. She has a lot of fire though, in the best way. I think she'll come out swinging."

Natara smiled at that. "I believe it."

"I've heard she talks about you a lot," Lilah hummed, smiling too. "In her therapy session with our counselors. I don't know all the information, of course, but I've heard it's 'Natara this' and 'Natara Faez' that."

Tara's cheeks felt like they were burning. She thanked the gods that it was hard to see the colour on her skin tone, especially after how many hours she'd spent in the sun.
"She's a pretty big Avenger's fan."

Lilah looked her over, kindness and a hint of seriousness. "She's a big Natara Faez fan," She corrected.
Giving one final nod and exchanging a few more words, Lilah eventually gave her arm a squeeze in farewell before leaving.

Natara finished her water and got out her phone, messaging Alessia.
'What's next?'

She got a reply quickly.

'Another job well done, I see.
This next one's pretty big, a lot of big names and it's been around a while. Sending through the details now.
Be safe ;)'

Natara read the message, sending a fast reply. She read everything over. Time to start planning.

She was getting good at this and more than that, Tara felt like she had a purpose again. Something she could do where the outcome couldn't be worse than what these people had already endured.

She'd needed this... and she couldn't stop now.