We belong together

Break up

It only has been a few months since we got together.

I felt squirm about our relationship, I don't know what to do.

But there's nothing else rather than breaking up.

I told you that my sister told on me with my mom and we have to go our separate ways.

You said that why can't I just say that it's all a lie.

I didn't feel any guilt on me.

Because I still had no idea about relationships that time.

Eventually we did go our separate ways.

I tried chatting you still thinking we could be friends,crying at night because you ghosted me.

Thinking all that it was your fault.

One day I cried so hard, Yana texted me asking if we could hang. I texted Yana about everything that happened.

I cried until my eyes were red.

I went out with Yana and hanged with her. I forgot everything that had happened.

Until I got home, I did eventually stopped chatting you knowing everything I did was wrong.

Very wrong.

We didn't have any contact or anything anymore, we did go our separate ways I guess.

I'm missing you every time knowing that I still do have feelings for you still.

And I have no idea if you still do too. I saw that you unfriended me on everything.

I felt guilty of what I did knowing that we won't get back together. Ever again, I'm still missing you till this day.

What if I never said that? What if that I could've just told you what was the actual reason?

What if?

It was all me, you deserved much better.

I never knew I would make a boy cry. Ever...

I tried to reach out to you, chatting you saying sorry and adding you thinking that you would even care.

I know that you don't because all I did was wrong. It wasn't right for me to say those things knowing that they're all lies.

Remembering me saying we should break up and laughing about it knowing that i didn't just break a boys heart.

It makes me sick to my stomach still thinking about that day.

I can still hear myself laughing.

I feel repulsive.

I loath myself from doing that. I should've just talked to him but I didn't wanna hurt his feelings too.

But I never knew he would cry over me. I was just  an outcast I'm not pretty or special or anything like that.

Or maybe he really did fell in-love with me, but I guess I will never know.

Will I?