The ImagiNation, Project Sekai || HOPE FOR A BRIGHTER FUTURE

Chapter 20 - I Feel a Little Better

I started going to visit the Virtual Singers in Wonderland Sekai all the time. I even got to eat ice cream with Kaito!! I was starting to feel a little better now that I was talking to someone, that someone was Len. I had also been very proud of myself for slowly but surely making Naoya happier. He had also apologized for calling me a liar.

Mizuki had given me the dress to go out with Rui a long time ago already, and I was finally going to ask him to go with me to a café. Specifically the one Saki worked at. 

"Of course I'll go with you." Rui replied whenever I asked him to come to that café with me.  

I knew Mommy and Daddy didn't very much like Rui, but I wanted to go out with him anyways. "Ehehe... okay. So pick me up sometime after school?" I suggested. 

Rui nodded in agreement. "Yes, that sounds good." 

That evening when he picked me up I was very nervous. I had never been on a date before! What if he secretly thought I was super ugly? Maybe he was only my boyfriend because he didn't want me to feel bad... I wondered if I was unconsciously changing my personality for him. 

When he rang the doorbell I scrambled down the stairs and opened the door for him. My heart was beating so fast... and I was most likely visibly blushing. 

Rui had dressed himself up in a fancy suit. He looked very handsome wearing it! "Hello." He smiled at me, and blushed. 

Sometimes, when I looked at Rui I had this feeling inside of my heart... like I really loved him and I wasn't just crushing on him. I cared about that purple haired fool too much! He was my favorite weirdo. Love really feels like magic. 

We walked together, his arm around mine. I was so happy I felt like I was going to explode. Then we finally arrived at our destination.

As I sat talking with him at the café, I realized that we were the same in many ways. It was insane how I loved him so much but I hated myself with a passion. It seemed he disliked himself to some degree as well. Rui really did love me! 

That night, He himself told me the story about how when he was little nobody liked him. I had a similar experience.

"That's why I did shows alone in middle school. I wasn't going to force anybody to like me. People are people, and I am me." Rui said with a slightly sad smile. "But I'm very grateful for the friends I do have that like me. I'm very grateful for you, too. I never would have known such a kind and beautiful girl would have been mine one day..." His expression brightened up and he had a huge smile on his cute face. 

"Thank you, Rui. I'm happy to have you as well. Hehe--" I giggled. "Well, when I was younger there were kids that liked me, but I subconsciously ignored them, only focusing on the ones that didn't like me. I was always chasing this Isabel girl around. She didn't like me but I really wanted to be her friend. It didn't exactly end well." I sighed, remembering all of those times I was ignored by her. 

"You kind of remind me of the way I was in middle school, Setsuko." Rui said to me out of nowhere. 

I was very confused. "Huh? Why...?" 

"In middle school, I didn't actually know what I wanted to do with myself." Rui paused and looked off in the distance. "I had a dream, but it seemed a lot like I didn't because I only did what I believed would satisfy me. I truly wanted to do shows with other people, to see everybody smile. It's a much nicer performing alongside a friend." He told me. 

"Well, that does sound a lot like me... I don't really have anything I wanna do. It makes everything feel meaningless." I sighed. "I think we should talk about something else, this is making me feel sad." 

Rui smiled at me so I'd feel better. "Alright." 

There was a long silence, neither of us really knew what to talk about instead. 

"I love you--" I told Rui randomly. 

He held my hand and looked at me with gentle eyes. "I love you too."

I wanted to know what Rui really thought of me. What went through his head when he saw me? Was it similar to what I thought when I saw him? An I love you with no words at all? I wondered if his heart ached for my approval as mine did. 

Before I knew it, we were going home. Rui gave me a kiss goodbye. "I love you. Bye-bye." After that was said, he walked away, into the night. 

I went up to my room, trying to avoid everybody. My thoughts had ruined the nice moment Rui and I were having at the café. 

I was looking into the stand-up mirror I had in my room. Suddnely, Mary the Mad was there to make everything more of a living hell. 

"Get out!! Go away!!!" I screeched whenever I saw her. 

Mary stared back at me with vacant eyes. It was like she was dead inside. "No." She said to me firmly. 

I knocked the mirror over in a panic, and it shattered very loudly. The glass was spread out all across the floor. I thought she was gone, but then suddenly I felt someone violently push me to the ground.