ＴＷＯ ＢＩＲＤＳ

7

"mr. han, something is wrong with jisung!"

after hearing that, I immediately ran towards the studying room.

I almost fell when I ran down the stairs, that was kind of embarrassing, but no, that wasn't what was on my mind.
the only thing I was thinking about was jisung.

what was wrong with him?

I ran into the studying room, where he was.

jisung was sitting on the floor, shaking, hugging his knees and crying.

I immediately kneeled next to him, putting my hands on his shoulders.
"jisung? jisung, what's wrong?"
I asked him sweetly, trying to calm him down with my voice.

he once told me that my voice is really calming, so I'm focusing on talking to him sweetly and gently, because he deserves that.

"it's all my fault, it's all my fault, I shouldn't be alive, I should die a painful death, maybe my mom would forgive me then. it's all my fault, why was I born? why couldn't I just die? I'm such a disappointment, my dad doesn't love me, but I want to be loved, I just want to be loved!" jisung sobbed out.

I gently cupped jisungs face, making him look at me.
"jisung, your moms death isn't your fault. I'm sure your mom wants you to live your life to the fullest. her death wasn't your fault. nothing that happened in your life is your fault, okay? listen to my voice, and focus on only that, okay? can you hear me?"

"but you will get fired because of me~."
he sobbed out.

"jisung, im not getting fired, don't worry. I won't leave you, okay?" I said.

"really?" he asked, finally looking at me with his teary eyes and pouty lips.

"really, now follow my breathing, okay?"

jisung nodded, his teary eyes looking deep in mine.

I started breathing slowly, noticeably, so that he could follow it and calm his breathing down.

he started following my slow breathing, while looking deep into my eyes.
after a little while, his breathing got back to normal and he collapsed on me in exhaustion.

I caught him, holding him close.
the only physical tough I could bear was his.
and he needed it.
so I was more than happy to provide it for him.

"I'm tired."
he whispered.

"let's get you to bed, shall we?"
I said, and he nodded.

I picked him up and I carried him to his room, gently putting him on the bed and tugging him in.

"I will cancel your last tutoring lesson and then you will talk with your therapist, okay?"
I said.
"now sleep."

"please stay with me."
he whispered.

I sighed.
I couldn't stay here with him.
not after getting yelled by from his dad.

his father especially told me to never sleep in the same bed with jisung.
homophobic much?

so no, I couldn't risk him seeing me laying next to him.

and the way jisung always cuddles up to me?
hell no, if he caught us cuddling like that, I'm loosing this job.

so no, I can't risk that.

"jisung, you have to rest. sleep well, okay?"

"why won't you stay with me?"
he asked me.
I could see the hurt in his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I will come and wake you up when your therapist arrives, okay?"
I said and gave him a small smile, before leaving his room.

I sighed.
honestly, I wanted to say yes so badly.
I knew he needed me right now.
he needed someone who he can trust, and give him reassurance that everything will be okay.

I went downstairs, straight to the kitchen, where the sweet maid was.

"miss?"

she turned around.
"oh, minho! do you need something?"

I sighed.
"well, mr. han found out about the fact I took han to see the ducks and he wasn't exactly happy. jisung had a panic attack. do you think that you can check on him and stay with him until he falls asleep?"

she sighed.
"my poor jisung. of course I can do that. I will make him some tea too and I will bring him his lunch. you should also prepare yourself for lunch."
she gave me a sad smile and started boiling the water for the tea.

"thank you." I smiled and left the kitchen.

mr. han was nowhere to be seen, but I assumed he's in his office now, or he left to smash with someone.
honestly, don't know, don't care.

I went into my room, which was right next to jisungs, and I sat down on my bed.

now, that I was sure someone who was close to jisung was with him and kept him company, I rested my mind a little, before going downstairs for my lunch.

after absolutely amazing lunch, I went to my room and laid down.
I had a lot of free time now, considering jisungs therapist was going to come at 5pm.

I would much rather spend the free time with my sleeping beauty tho.

I just decided to scroll trough my phone, and after like half an hour, I heard the door next to me open and close, which signalized that someone left jisungs room.

I decided to check it.
it could be the maid leaving, or jisung going downstairs to get something to drink.

I got up and opened my door, looking around the hallway, and when i didn't see anyone, I went to jisungs room.

I knocked first, and when I received no answer, I slowly and quietly opened the door.

as I expected, jisung was laying in his bed, fast asleep.
that meant the maid stayed here with him until he fell asleep.
I have to thank her for that later.

I smiled at my sleeping beauty and I went closer to him.

I caressed his cheek.
jisungs skin was really soft.

my eyes traveled all around his face.

his eyes

his nose

his beautiful cheeks

the mold on his cheek

his lips

his lips.

they looked so soft.
so easy to ruin....