8-Jakeward Incorrect Quotes

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Jacob: "Being gay is a constant battle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my lover, our legs tangling as we listen to the birds" and "Hey, let's go throw rocks at fascists" and I think that's very sexy of us."

Edward: "If the window's open and you time it right, we can do both."
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Edward: "I feel like doing something stupid."

Jacob: "I'm stupid, do me."
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Jacob: "This date is boring!"

Edward: "This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store."

Jacob: "Then why did you invite me?"

Edward: "I didnt, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Edward I'll do whatever I want.""
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Jacob: "I hate you."

Edward: "It's cool, I hate myself too."
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Jacob: "Let me get this clear, I hate you."

Edward: "Let go of my hand then."

Jacob, squeezes Edward's hand harder: "No, fuck off."

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Jacob: "You-" *points at Edward* "-me, date."

Edward: "You? Me? Fat chance."

Jacob: "I have a chance! AND IT'S FAT!"

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Jacob: "1 universe, 9 planets, 7 seas, 7 continents, 195 countries, and 809 islands.. Then I had the unfortunate luck to meet you're handsome, annoying face."

Bella, from another room: "There are only 8 planets!"

Jacob: "Fuck off, viva la pluto!"

Edward: *whispers* "I'm handsome?"
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Edward: "I don't want to be your boyfriend anymore."

Jacob: "I knew it, you hate me, I know we're supposed to be mortal enemies-"

Edward: "Jacob..-"

Jacob: "No, no, I know, we can't defy nature's law right? The council will be happy about this.. a-and the Volturi wouldn't-"

Edward: "Jacob."

Jacob, in tears and denial about it: "-hurt you either, so I'm not hurt, I swear, I understand, I love you so much. Goo-"

Edward, on his knees holding out a ring: "Jacob! Shut up you fucking idiot, I want to be your husband!"

Jacob: "H-huh?"

Edward: "Marry me."
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Teacher: "Your child was in a fight."

Edward: "Oh no, that's terrible!"

Jacob: "Did they win?"

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