Breaking The Ice Queen

Chapter eleven

I came into the office quite early just to skip traffic. I didn't run to the coffee shop or make any quick stops. I came straight here for no apparent reason. After settling down behind my desk, I took my laptop from the drawer and set it before me. It takes some time to switch on, so I sit back and look at the clock against the wall. Damn, my office needs some redecorating.
My heart stopped when I saw that I got a mail from Ryan. In case you forgot like I nearly did, Ariana's biological father. I opened the mail and read the message.

"This is why I chose to start over new on my own," it reads. I open the attachments one by one. Each one is as disgusting as the others, but he seems happy. I was just about to type him a long, hateful message, but my mind changed. He's not worth my time. Instead, I block his email address so that I won't receive anything from him again.

"I was hoping I'd find you," Tania says, bursting into my office. I glance at her and sit back in my chair.

"Don't you know how to knock?" I ask her a little rudely. "It's very rude just bursting in on people like that, Tania."

"Well, you're screwing my dad, so practically, I get to bother you whenever I like whether you like it or not," she says and drops the paper on the table. I push my laptop aside and take the papers into my hands. "But I do apologize for my bad behavior. I'll try to remember to knock next time."

"Rose-Ann Kendall and her new fling? What is this?" I ask horrified, looking at the picture taken of me with Stephen. "Wait, who even took this? It's probably one of our photographers, but how did it get out?"

"I have no idea," Tania replies and sits back comfortably in the chair. "I don't mind you dating dad, but if you're planning on making it public, please inform me."

"We're not dating, and we're definitely not a fling," I tell her straightforwardly and quickly run through the story they did on us. "Stephen Jacobs, also known as the world's sexiest man, has publicly been caught being very handsy on Rose-ann Kendall. According to a witness, he invited her into his shoot and immediately became physical with her. It's obvious everyone could feel the tension between them. Oh no, your dad is going to kill me."

"Relax," Tania says and sits forward. "Dad is our least worry. What you should worry about now is the person who gave this information. Surely, this person is working for you, Mrs. Kendall."

"It's Miss. Kendall," I corrected her and put the papers down. "This is a mess. I better talk to Ariana first before she finds out this way."

"Oh, she knows," Tania shrugs her shoulders so calmly. "She texted me about it because apparently it's all over social media."

"That explains why her dumb father tried to spite me with evidence of why he did what he did," I mutter to myself and inhale deeply. "Thank you for informing me, Tan. I will phone your dad immediately and then arrange a press meeting to confirm that it's all false."

"Mrs. Kendall, if you and dad decide to take your relationship to another step, please consider telling us before making it public," Tania says and gets up from her seat. "Now, let me get on with my shop, and I'll see you during the day."

I remain quiet and watch her leave. Honestly, I wouldn't mind taking my relationship with Stephen further, but on the same note, it will only harm our friendship. I'd rather lose him as a lover than as a friend. Personally, it's too scary to risk a beautiful friendship for something romantic, especially since I'm fresh out of a divorce. Yes, I'm over Tony and the breakup, but I want to keep my humanity by not rushing off into something serious. What if this relationship doesn't end up working out just like my other two marriages?

I couldn't talk personally to Stephen over the phone. I'm too scared. What if he goes off on me like a bomb because of this. Instead, I left him a message telling him to meet me at Tania's Deli at twelve for lunch. He's got to turn up, right? I just need to explain to him that this was out of my hands and that we can correct it.

"You've got a meeting with the press tomorrow at ten, and then your dearly beloved Jessica wants to personally see you this afternoon. I told her you're busy and that she has to meet through me, but she refused," Jasmine says, following me down the passage all the way to the deli.

"Well, it's either our way or no way," I reply to Jasmine and stop at the entrance. He just sits there, reading through the papers. My heart beats heavily against my chest. "That girl has an attitude that pisses me off. You tell her that if she walks into my office without consulting you first, I will personally fire her. I don't want to see her. I need her to do her job, what she came to do, and what she gets paid to do. I do not get impressed by bribery or fake innocent friendly people who want my approval."

"Yes ma'am," Jasmine nods awkwardly. "Anything else?"

"Nope," I reply and walk away from her to Stephen, who sat there waiting. He jumps up when his eyes catch me. I take a seat and give him a serious look. He sits down and pushes the paper aside. "I've arranged a meeting with the press to deny these false rumors about us."

"Wow," he looks down and chuckles. I give him an odd look. He doesn't seem happy or impressed. "A good afternoon can work too, you know."

"Stephen, I'm gonna be honest with you. We've been spending a lot of time together lately, and everything is just happening so fast. Perhaps we should put our guard up again and just wait for everything to calm down," I say and sit forward, looking down unhappily. So, now I'm risking our friendship after all. "The press will always be after me, Stephen. I just can't do that to you. I can't lose you because of stupid rumors. There's a lot of pressure in this industry, and I know it's on me. I involved you in this and now..."

"Rose, when I looked at the paper this morning, I felt a little upset about it. Partly, because it isn't true, but at the same time, I felt good. People will look at me and think, he finally found someone, especially someone as beautiful as Rose-Ann Kendall. The idea that I won't be alone anymore and that I can somehow finally spend my life with someone... I want to convince myself that this means nothing, but somehow, it means something to me. Not because you're famous and it's a step up for me..."

"Stephen," I breathe heavily and place my hand on his to get his attention. "This isn't about me. I don't want to make this about me. This is about you. You are labeled as the world's sexiest man, and you can have any woman that you want. I'm afraid that they will see me as an opportunist by posing with you and having it rumored that we're romantically involved."

"Well, I can't agree. I'm sorry," he says and shrugs his shoulders. "I might have any woman in the world, but I don't want them. I have my heart set on you, Rose, and I'm not ashamed to admit it."

"Oh, Steph," I shake my head with tears in my eyes. "I'm really sorry, but I can't... I can't do this anymore. I love you as a friend and I'm afraid. I'm afraid of falling in love and falling out again. I'm afraid I'll fail you like I did with my first two marriages."

I get up from my seat. It's better I don't say too much and just leave.

"I'm sorry, Stephen Jacobs," I cry softly and turn around, leaving him there. He probably should've run after me, but nothing can change my mind now. I'm so tired of feeling this way. I walked out of relationships my whole life, but I never had as much pain as I'm having now. Maybe because I only know him as a good man and not by his flaws.
I ruined something that felt real for the first time. I hurt someone who had the most patience for me and never rushed me into anything. Who first appeared to be flirty and kind but never got in my bed or my pants.