Was I Ever Here? ; jenlisa ff G!P

10

Jennie Pov

I reach for the back door and swing it open, the distinct scent of the pub hitting my senses like a brick wall. I stand frozen in place while still holding onto the door handle. I waver in between wanting to run away as far as possible and walking inside to finally face the terrible memories still clinging to me.

It's my first shift back since Ian's kidnapping—and subsequent murder. I couldn't avoid it forever. Alas, I have bills to pay. Only the rich can mourn the dead.

Eventually, I yank myself out of the stupor I've inadvertently fallen into and walk inside, readying myself for my shift. I made sure to schedule my first night back with Rosè. I'm desperate for moral support, but try to pretend I'm not dead inside while I pour drinks all night for faceless customers.

As usual, Rosè works the floor while I tend the bar. Eventually, I fall into a workflow, attempting to concentrate on the repeated movements of making drinks and stashing bills into the till. I try to keep my head down as much as possible while the bar fills up with the rowdy evening crowd.

When the rush finally slows down, I slink towards my best friend, who's leaning against the service bar pouring us shots for moral support. She takes hers with a smile but keeps her eyes over my shoulder as she drinks it down. I bring the glass to my lips, swallowing the gin in one gulp. I hold the back of my hand to my mouth as the familiar burn trails down my throat.

"Dude, who's the hottie in the corner?" Rosè asks with a crooked smile, still peering over my shoulder. I watch her tilt her chin over to the corner of the bar, prompting me to follow her gaze and swivel around, curious.

I find piercing brown eyes staring back at me. My heart crashes into my ribcage and I duck down on instinct, adrenaline shooting up my spine.

"Jennie?" Rosè laughs peering over the bar only to find me trying to hide and failing. With the way the bar is designed—an oval area with a large space in the middle for the bartenders to work in—and her current vantage point, I'm not hiding for shit. And she's staring straight at me. I look at her in defeat, knowing all to well it's pure terror she sees splashed across my face.

It's the one with the scar coiled around her neck. The one who I still remember in perfect detail even if I've tried very hard not to.

Unbothered, she continues to watch me, an amused look in her eyes. I turn my attention to Rosè, my body beginning to shake. Am I going into shock? Her smile suddenly drops when she sees the expression on my face.

"What's wrong?" She looks over to the hottie in the corner and then back down to me, confusion dragging her eyebrows down. I'm once again paralyzed, unable to sound out any words, let alone move.

Rosè finally grabs my arm from over the service bar and shoves me out and into the hallway near the kitchen. "Jennie, what the fuck is going on? You're scaring me." Her worry rises as I tremble in place, barely able to push the words out of my mouth.

"I...I need some air," I manage to mutter out. Rosè is clearly confused by my sudden reaction but says nothing more, she makes sure Jack is covering the bar and follows me out back.

As soon as we're outside near the dumpsters, she finally speaks, "Bitch, you better tell me what the hell is going on right this fucking second!"

I'm barely keeping it together as I glance at her, wishing I could be anywhere else but here. Her arms are crossed looking worried, waiting for me to start explaining. I wrap my arms around myself, trying to gather my thoughts.

"It's her, Rosie!" I feel small and defeated like an animal waiting to be slaughtered, while Rosè expression goes from slightly annoyed to confused to sudden realization in under five seconds. Her mouth falls open, her eyes growing wide. "Well, it's one of them at least," I add.