Forget-me-not | Seungmin

Cynthia

Later that night, Cynthia sat with her head in her hands. She watched Flora stir a pot on the stove. Flora had been talking about some of the things that happened at her workplace. Apparently, she worked at some large technology cooperation and worked on computers. 

Cynthia didn't fully understand it and when she talked about it, it confused her. The concept of technology and the internet was mind blowing. It fascinated her and yet made her brain hurt at the same time. 

"So what did you do today?" 

Cynthia pulled her chin away from her hands and shrugged. "I did what I normally do. I watched some television. I watched that one show I was watching yesterday. I unpacked some of my clothes and put them in my closet." 

It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the full truth either. Cynthia decided to leave out the part where she admitted that she left the apartment. When she came back to the apartment complex, she pulled open her notes app on her phone. Flora had typed their floor number and door number in her phone, so she had it in case of emergency. 

"That sounds fun." 

Cynthia hummed in agreement and continued watching Flora. She had a variety of ingredients sitting out and waiting for her to use them. She was making homemade macaroni and cheese. Silence settled over the room while she stirred roux together. 

This weekend, Flora wanted to teach Cynthia how to make a meal. The pair hadn't decided what to make yet. Cynthia was clueless about the options. Flora hadn't even had the chance to ask her what she wanted. She was so caught up with her job. She opened her mouth to speak, but Cynthia said something that rocked her world. 

"This might be weird to ask, but do I have a boyfriend?" 

The wooden spoon dropped from Flora's hand and clattered onto the floor. She cursed beneath her breath and picked it up. Cynthia watched her face studying her reaction. Flora's head shook and she let out a strained laugh. "Have you been watching k-dramas with romance?" 

"No, I'm just curious." 

Flora turned back to the pot, so Cynthia wouldn't see her face. "You've never had a significant other, no. I bet you've been watching too much romance based stuff." 

"Like I said, I was just curious." She let out a sigh thinking about the words her former boss told her earlier at the flower shop. He mentioned her boyfriend and his band. "I had this dream not long ago and I don't know. I guess it was weird and made me wonder." 

"What dream?" 

"I was in a field and there was this stranger. I couldn't see his face, but he talked to me. He said we knew each other, but he wouldn't tell me his name." 

"Oh?" Flora's voice raised an octave. Her chest rose and fell with a deep breath. "The subconscious is a funny thing and dreams usually don't mean much. If I were you, I'd take that with a grain of salt." 

"Yeah, I know, but...I don't know. I guess it just felt like I knew him or something. It's probably like you said and it meant nothing." 

"You have a long way to go before you can even consider getting a significant other. You're damaged right now and you'd be too much for anyone else. So many appointments and reminders for you. I mean you can't even remember where we live," Flora chuckled. "How could anyone love you like this?" 

Cynthia didn't utter a word. That familiar lump crept up the back of her throat. With those words, Flora crushed Cynthia's heart between her hands. "Is that really what you think of me?" Her fingers curled into fists and her nails dug into her palms. 

"What? Oh, I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that not everyone can handle this amount of responsibility." Flora looked away from the pan of thickened mixture and turned to face Cynthia. Her face fell when she saw Cynthia's teary eyes. 

 "No, no, no," she hurried over to Cynthia. "Don't cry, I didn't mean it. I'm an absolute idiot for saying that to you. It just came out wrong. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm an absolute asshole. Please don't take that to heart." She put her hands on Cynthia's shoulders. 

"Am I that much of a burden?" Cynthia whispered. 

"Not for me, no. I swear, I didn't mean it. My words came out all wrong." Flora tugged her closer to her chest and wrapped her arms around her back. "How about after dinner we can go for a walk? There's a really nice bakery not too far away and we can get dessert." 

Cynthia sniffled and Flora placed a hand on the back of her head. She ran her fingers through the back of Cynthia's waves. Cynthia shut her eyes and tried to brush off the words, but it was too late. Flora had already said them and the damage was already done. 

"You're not a problem for me and I'm glad I have you. I meant that other people would be overwhelmed by what you're struggling with. Not everyone has the patience and the upbeat attitude to help you. I'm glad that you're here with me and I get to help you." 

"One day you'll be better and you'll figure out how life works again. You'll find a significant other and everything will be okay. Right now, all we can do is take you to your appointments and focus on one thing at a time. Baby steps are so important and romantic relationships can be challenging. Do you understand what I'm saying?" 

Cynthia nodded, but she wasn't sure she believed in Flora anymore.