i wasn't going to talk about this, but then i remembered i use this as a personal diary, and the ones who know about it only know about it if they read it, so here i am... i also just needed an outlet other than my friends, parents.
also, i'm not doing this for pity.
please don't get the wrong idea, i am hurt beyond my understanding, so much so that i'm still trying to process is after it ended, but i'm not here for attention or some sort of therapy session... i'm just here because i want to write about it.
so... the ones following me on my main account know i have been talking about my boyfriend a lot. "my boyfriend got me this, and he did this, and that, bla bla bla bla."
well, he's not my boyfriend anymore.
i pulled him aside to talk about marriage, and how i wasn't so ready for it, because i'm twenty, but in the same breath, he told me that he's cheated on me.
for the longest time i couldn't even say it, i thought it was my fault. a very nasty user on bts island has been bullying me over this, which is not the point of the entry, but i'm absolutely appalled that yet again, a woman is blamed for a man's actions...
if you've ever been cheated on, you will understand the feeling of disappointment, heartbreak, and disgust at the same time. i loved a cheater, and i'm sad it ended even though he cheated on me. i feel disgusting while he's telling me to "start over".
whatever the conversation or topic is, people will always find "mistakes" in the woman, instead of asking the man why he did it. i am done with it. i will not stand for armys who choose to make fun of a woman's heartbreak, and i hope you don't either.
anyways, what i'm trying to say is i'm single xx
