Mindf**k Series Camren Conversion

Chapter 8

Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice.

—William Shakespeare

LAUREN

Camila is pressed against me, her head on my chest, as my fingers idly run through her hair. It's after three in the morning, and neither of us have even thought about sleeping.

Instead, we've spent the past several hours just talking about anything and nothing at all. Mostly it's been mundane stuff, when we weren't wrapped around each other and doing less chatty things.

Her cheek has a small graze on it from a bullet that got too damn close, but it's not bleeding. It should be a reminder that she's not invincible, but she seems to think battle scars are better than victim scars.

"So I spent all that time worried about Plemmons targeting you, and you spent all that time annoyed with me for keeping him from you?" I ask, staying on the conversation we've veered to.

I feel her smile against my chest, and she runs her fingers down my stomach, tracing the lines there.

"A little annoyed, but mostly I just felt cared for. If I hadn't wanted him dead so he could never hurt you, then I would have appreciated all your concern a lot more."

She presses a kiss to my chest, and I tug her tighter to my side as I stare up at the ceiling, trying to sort through everything. It's a mess in my head. It's a mess everywhere inside me.

I'm questioning everything I've ever stood for.

Judge, jury, and executioner has never been something I've agreed with. I've fought for legality and true justice. My entire world has centered around it since I was offered a position within the FBI.

"How'd you learn to fight like you do?"

"You haven't seen me fight," she sighs. "I'd never fight you."

My lips twitch as I glance down at her. She peers up at the same time.

"Should we test to see who's better?"

She stifles a grin, trying to keep a serious face. "Agent Jauregui, I think it'd be emasculating if I kicked your ass. So don't worry, I'll hold back if you ever get brave enough."

I laugh, finding the sound almost sad. Her smile is just as grim amidst the heavy air around us when she lays her head back down and resumes her task of tracing idle circles.

"So now that all your worst secrets are aired, maybe you can share a little about your past," I say quietly, feeling her stiffen next to me as her fingers still on my chest.

"You've already heard everything they did. Do you need more detail than that?" she asks in a harsh whisper.

I tilt her face up, palming her cheek. She meets my eyes with the same fearlessness she faces the rest of the world, but I see the vulnerable girl tucked away inside her; the girl she has to protect after all she's been through.

"I was talking about your past before all that happened. Something that would tell me about the girl you used to be."

She cuts her gaze away, blowing out a breath.

"The girl I used to be is dead. Knowing how naïve and fragile she was won't do anything but break your heart right now. Because you'll picture me as her. You've had the real me the entire time, Lauren. Nothing between us or how I was with you was a lie. Only snippets of my past were altered for the sake of keeping my secret."

I can feel her drifting away even as she presses closer to me.

Instead of letting her float off inside her own mind, I shift, turning and coming down on top of her. She tries to kiss me, but I pull back as I settle comfortably between her legs and keep my lips just out of reach of hers.