[Fyodor D. X Reader] Birds in the House of the Living

03: Stańczyk

[The song Gogol was humming: Тёмная ночь - Марк Бернес]

♰

"My, my, you truly are an adorable little thing. You really believe that I can be the one to stop him from doing so?"

Nikolai mused, sitting on a freshly cut log. He wasn't wearing his usual eyesore of an outfit. You withdrew your bloodied hands from the horned-animal, wiping off the blood from your blade as you did so.

A feeling of shame surged throughout your nervous system as you stared at the lifeless animal. Anger is rough and heavy, but shame was something different with its shallowness. You feel your heart threatening to pump out of your throat, much one like a cardiovascular disease.

With your gift; the ability to connect and interact in the supernatural realm, you were supposed to sympathise with them. You were supposed to hear their cries of injustice of having their lives taken out of their will, but no, you opposed that duty. You are.. A horrible person.

And that voice was always there in the back of your head; a parasitic one disguising itself as a conscience offering you the receiving good of a commensalism symbiotic relationship. It drives you in a state of a black and white thinking. Kill hostility, tolerate indifference.

"You're his friend, or something.. Can't you stop him?"

With blood dripping down your clothes, you turn your head to the jester, with his eyes set on the birds settling themselves on a tree branch as he hums a melody of a song from the Soviet era.

"Our Dostoy here is both logical and illogical - a man full of contradictions. His goal makes zero sense, and even after his death, all his progress will inevitably be reversed. He will never achieve the perfect world he's fighting for."

Yes, the war he creates with himself, a declaration of battle towards one of his own.. A sinless world without the wrongdoings of ability users is what he deemed ideal. The reversal of this world before humans gained power to compete alongside Gods is what he seeks. With the strength and omnipresence of ability users, they won't need God, and that was what he dreaded.

"Why should I stop him, hmm? Tell me, tell me! If that's what he will do, then so be it! Tell me, dollface, why should I bend my definition of freedom to stop him?"

His high-pitched voice echoed in the woods as you dusted off your coat, your eyes finding its way to avert itself from the animal and the pool of blood it created, the dark red blemishing the innocent and pure white of snow. You sat adjacent to Nikolai, the log was big enough so that a few inches of space were in between you both.

"You don't seem phased at all.. If you're his old friend, then I guess you have known of this for a long time?"

You cocked your head to the side, a curious expression would be seen on your face. A friend not minding, and even encouraging his friends' suicide is something you don't mostly see everyday. Fyodor was truly illogical with his logic. You wish to question him more about his plans and ideals, but he had better things to do for today, leaving you with his clown friend. Being alone with Nikolai proves to you how quickly a ten minute walk turned into animal cruelty and a gossip session.

"I am aware that my dear friend is a corpse in training, and I am happy for him. He finds his own definition of freedom with that goal of his, and freedom is what we deserve. Isn't that the same reason you decided to fight alongside him, or did you feel obliged to just because he saved you?"

Nikolai chuckles, going on with his ramblings as he sits himself closer to you like a child devoid of mental intelligence and no concept of personal space.