Teenage Dream • Fermín Lopez

Chapter 50: Long Overdue Talks

🎶 Holding On And Letting Go — Ross Copperman 🎶

I didn't know what happened downstairs as after that scene, I rushed up to my room to cry. Everything was such a mess - I still couldn't believe that Fati had been cheating on my brother after being together for four years... How could she do that to him? And my God, how had Fermín shot that picture with me and Don Francisco? Had he been in the church? Why had he been there?

I don't know how much time had passed, but I was pretty sure that everyone had gone home by now and I felt sorry for Mum who had spent so much energy into cooking all the courses for the lunch. And now it was over before it could really start.

Suddenly, my room's door opened and I saw Mum peaking in.
"Can I come in?" she asked and I just nodded, burying my head between my knees again.
"Clarita..." she sighed as she sat down next to me and started rubbing my back. "You want to tell me what's been going on?" she asked with a soft voice and I took a deep breath.

"This Summer when Fermín returned... something was different. I... we... four years ago after the bonfire, we lost our virginities to each other but it was a... friendly thing back then. I don't know, everything changed when I moved to Barcelona, we started hanging out more and one thing led to the other. I was ready to tell you guys about us when I was back for the game in Huelva, but he stalled and said we should do it together, so I waited. Everything was going great and we were ready to tell Carlito first, but... I got cold feet. I had gone on Instagram and started reading all sort of things about footballers cheating and doing really dirty stuff and I just... panicked that Fermín would do the same to me one day. I know that being with him would require also sacrifices from me and I... just was afraid that I'd give up whatever for him and get a cheater back in return. I told him this stuff in a rage, and he shouted at me that if I was this annoying it would be no wonder if cheated on me one day" I sniffled and leaned onto her shoulder.
"Oh baby..." she whispered and kissed my hair softly.

"Apparently that was some sort of break-up as we didn't talk to each other until I saw him two weeks ago at a club and we... well, you heard downstairs. I wrote that speech for him yesterday and poured my heart and soul into it, but he didn't care and while I hoped he would talk to me afterwards, he just disappeared" I said with a shaky voice as tears were rolling over my cheek.
"A kid spilled its juice all over him and he went home to change and then went looking for you. He came here to ask if you were home but... I told him you were at church..." mum said and I closed my eyes. That's why he was there - he was looking for me and found... that.
"What was that picture, Clarita?" my mum asked me and looked so disappointed.
"It... was a spur of a moment, we had fun and I tripped, he caught me... It meant nothing and I honestly don't care. I only want Fermín" I sobbed.

"Oh baby..." Mum said and I hugged her tightly, crying into her blouse until there were no more tears left.
"Where's Carlito?" I asked.
"In his room. Dad went up to him, I don't know if he's still there..." she replied and I nodded, standing up to face a conversation that was long overdue.

I knocked at Carlito's room and peaked my head inside.
"Hi... Can we talk?" I asked and he nodded. But before starting to speak, I went over to him and hugged him. Thankfully, he hugged me back and we stayed like that for a few minutes.
"I'm so sorry" we both said in unison and laughed at our twin connection.
"Can I go first?" I asked and he nodded. And I told him everything I had also just told my mum, maybe with a bit more graphic information so that he would get the full picture.
"... and I'm so sorry I didn't tell you earlier but we were in this perfect bubble and I was afraid that your possible reaction would burst it. However, I still managed to do that all on my own" I sighed as I finished talking.
"Oh gosh, you two are so perfect for each other... He's really hurt, Clarita. That you would think he would cheat and turn a full-on asshole on you. He'd never do that" Carlito replied and I nodded.
"I know but... I'm afraid it's too late" I sniffled. "But what happened with Fati?" I quickly asked.

"A classmate of hers... has been going on for months apparently - I... I feel so guilty and don't know what I did wrong. I keep going back in circles - was I not giving her enough love? Should I have done more? I... I don't know" he said and started crying.
"Shhhh... you did nothing wrong. There's never an excuse for cheating. It would have been better if she broke up, even if it was with no reason, and then get with another person. But you. are. not. at. fault." I told my brother as I took his head in his hands.

"What do we do now?" I asked him, sitting down next to him, our backs leaned onto the wall.
"You... should talk to Fermín" Carlito said and pointed at me.
"You aren't against it?" I asked.
"Hell no, you both are the persons I love most in this world. I was just upset at him downstairs and... let it out. But we're boys, we get back around without big apologies or excuses. You guys however... need to work it out" Carlito said and I nodded.
"I know, but I have to get some sleep first and put order to my thoughts, right now I'm all over the place and couldn't possibly tackle this" I sighed.
"Yeah, you're right... Good night Clarita. I love you lots" he said and smiled at me.
"I love you too Carlito" I replied and reciprocated the smile.

The next morning, I woke up only at ten or eleven, I had really been out for hours after my head was spinning around Fermín, Fati, Carlito and all of yesterday's happenings. Eventually, I stood up and got dressed before walking downstairs to grab a small breakfast. As I was pouring some cereal into my bowl, Dad appeared in the kitchen and stopped in his tracks when he saw me.

"Dad... I'm so sorry for yesterday. Those were so not things a father would want to hear about his daughter..." I said quietly and looked down at the ground, too ashamed to look him in the eyes.
"Clarita..." he said softly and I felt his big, strong arms around me. "It's hard to understand that my daughter is grown up, but now is the age to make mistakes. Love, take the risk, be foolish. Just do it" my father said.
"You're right. I'm going to Fermin's now and talk to him" I said as I put my bowl into the sink.
"Hey! Young lady! Not into the sink, in the dishwasher, now!" Dad scolded me as I was already putting on my shoes, and I rolled my eyes, quickly doing as he said before rushing out the door.

The walk to Fermin's parents' house wasn't long, as any distance in our hometown and after a few minutes I stood in front of the door, ringing the bell nervously.
"Clarita!" Fermin's mother said as she saw me standing there.
"Hi. Is Fermín here?" I asked and her face fell.
"No... sorry. He left for Barcelona yesterday evening after... everything. He only shouted at us and to be honest, I was happy that he left after he behaved like that" she sighed, making a gesture that I should come inside.

"I'm so sorry about everything Lola... If we had been more honest with everyone..." I muttered as we sat down on the couch next to each other.
"Don't say that. Life happens, we don't always have full control over it" she said and rubbed my back.
"I should have never let him go" I sniffled, feeling the tears in my eyes again.
"He shouldn't have let you go. I'm so pissed, he's behaving like a toddler throwing a tantrum" Lola replied and I had to crack a small smile. "He knows you're the ultimate girl for him, give him some time. He has to jump over his shadow and that has never been easy for him" she added.
"I know... I just... I just want him" I said and gave her a smile through my tears.
"Oh, I can't wait for the day you'll be my daughter-in-law" she said and I just laid my head onto her shoulder.