What she expected

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Growing up ,my mother would tell me I would never be good enough for a man because " I wasn't pretty enough or my hips wouldn't be wide enough to carry a man's child . Mi never really like man , they were the species that I never craved or yearned for . There was never a connection or understanding between me wanting to be taken care of by one, when my own father was already a disappointment to me .I lowered my head in sadness as her words sank deeper into my skin leaving a scar that was more mental than physical .Did she ever loved me ? Was I a mistake that kept her up at nights crying ,Tossing and turning ?. Yelling and screaming . I felt sorry for her because honestly my dad did her wrong . Did I really deserve such a mother ? Should I feel guilty ? Will I ever be good enough for her ?

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