This Old Agony 《Tom Riddle Fanfiction 》

𝕬𝖈𝖙 𝖔𝖓𝖊; 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖗𝖙 𝖔𝖋 𝖎𝖙 𝖆𝖑𝖑

Sometimes, I blame myself for being his friend. He was a warning sign. I can't bring myself to know why he was interesting to me. Thinking about it, how did I become friends with him? From our first interactions, I thought you believed I was a pathetic and annoying person. I would always start the conversation, as he was always silent.

 Seems that all I know is that my worst decision was knowing you, my dearest puzzle.

 I know that you thought that my fondness was weakness and stupidity. Yet, you liked it. You were fond of me. You enjoyed my company. Every day at the park, You would glance at me and no words would escape your lips. I didn't mind it most of the time; I would ignore it and do what I usually do: read, draw, or stare at the stars. You barely showed a sign of interest other than those weird glances. 

If they were even a sign.

However, as time passed, I ended up introducing myself. If my memory isn't failing as it does lately, then it was in the second year at the library that I made my biggest mistake of knowing you. You were reading a book about the dark arts, which I coincidentally read too.

I took the seat opposite you and opened a book that I had with me. It took me a few minutes to finally speak to you. "I have read that book," I said with an awkward smile decorating my face.

He glanced at me and nodded. He continued reading. It was the embarrassment that filled me up, as he didn't utter a single word. "What do you think of it?" he said, not glancing at me. That was the spark of hope for me. I may not be that pathetic after all? right?

No, but rather a fool

"Quite good; it could've been more detailed. However, I do prefer potions as a subject of interest," I said.

"I agree," he said hesitantly.

"Do you have better books related to this subject?" He looked at me. Oh Tom, you don't know how much that made me happy. A small talk filled my young self with joy.

"I do. Sadly, I don't remember all their names. I can give you a copy of the list that I own." I smiled

You nodded and returned to your reading.

__.

Blood was surrounding the room.

Scars and wounds were decorating my body.

How long will this last?

__.

It was one of those days when I sneaked out of my dorm and went to the park with a small bag of nuts. Sometimes, sleep can't make the voices stop. It doesn't prevent memories, either. That is the reason why I am in this mess.

I went to a tree that I had set up against most of the time. I hoped that my little friends would come that day before me, but it took them multiple minutes to come by. If it weren't for the darkness and an abundance of night, I would've seemed crazy.

It won't be a lie by now. Right, my little friend?

"Oh, puzzle, you came!" I said to the bird as I noticed its anticipated arrival.

He cawed.

"Hungry, aren't you?" I smiled softly as I took out a few nuts for him to eat. It takes him a few seconds to start eating.

Aren't you such a beautiful bird? It is always the same scenario of me admiring you, my dear bird.

However, the silence broke with footsteps that caused me to freeze for a few moments to try to hide. My hiding didn't last long, though, once I noticed it was you, Tom. It made me realise how fast my heartbeats were and how my fingers had shaken. I don't want to be scolded anymore.

Life, can you provide me with ease for once? What did I ever do to deserve all of this pain?

His eyes were full of interest. I can't figure out if it was one of his tricks or his genuine self. "Hello," I said awkwardly as I was hiding behind the tree with Mr. Puzzle enjoying his snack. He would keep on staring before words left his lips. Calculated or not. It was a habit of speaking with Tom. Maybe with me, as I do like to think.

"Hello," he replied.

Mr.Puzzle cawed at the sight of Tom appearing in his eyes. He cawed again and flew away. It confused me. "I apologise; he isn't very friendly," I said.

He nodded.

It was silence again filling the air.

Oh my heart, my weeping heart, you led to your misery