Harry Potter and the Lighting Lord

Chapter 16

After lunch, a rather irritated Harry Potter proceeded to the Defence classroom. He had just left the Great Hall in a testy mood. A first year named Colin Creevey had asked for signed photographs and Draco Malfoy had done his best to rile Harry up. It didn't work of course, as Harry had let Colin take his picture but had not signed anything. Draco Malfoy had an embarrassing moment when he farted loudly in the middle of the Great Hall. He had just begun accusing Harry of doing it when he had farted again. All the students had started laughing at the boy who left with a murderous expression on his face. It had only been the first day and Harry had already managed to annoy two people. Lockhart had better not try anything underhanded, for Harry wasn't in a good mood.

He entered the almost full Defence classroom and without a care in the world, sat next to Daphne.

"What's wrong?" whispered Daphne as she took his hand in hers, rubbing circles on it with her thumb to calm him down.

"Well, turns out that we have Transfiguration and Potions with the Gryffindors this year. McGonagall made me do the spells non-verbally and gave me points for it. Granger tried but didn't succeed and has been giving me filthy looks ever since. As you know, Malfoy annoyed me during lunch as well. And I'm pretty sure Dumbledore will call me to his office later today. To top of off, the peacock known as Lockhart is going to annoy the hell out of me. What else could go wrong?" he said.

Daphne giggled softly. "Who cares what Granger or Malfoy think? Since when have you paid attention to what people think of you anyway? You can handle Dumbledore, I have confidence in you. As for Lockhart, well, here he comes."

Sure enough, Lockhart gave a dramatic entrance and pointed to the various portraits of him and said "Me. Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class; Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League; five-time winner of Witch Weekly's most charming smile Award. Ah, I see you've bought my complete set of books. Well done. Let's start with a quiz. You have thirty minutes. Start-NOW!"

Harry looked at the questions with eyebrows raised. He smirked slightly and started writing.

1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite colour?

Gold, the colour of the galleons he gets by making poor children spend an exorbitant amount of money by forcing them to buy his books for school.

2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?

To make lots of money by fooling not only the British Wizarding public but people all over the world as well by selling his worthless books.

3. What, in your opinion, is Gildoroy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?

He successfully fooled the public to believe that he actually achieved all those feats he has written in his books; making them believe fiction to be fact is a good answer too.

54. What would Gilderoy Lockhart's ideal birthday gift be?

A Niffler. That way he wouldn't have to make people spend tons of gold to buy his books; he can just dig them from the ground or find them in a toilet where he and his books belong. Although a mirror for him to admire his reflection would be a good choice as well.

Harry smirked and cast the Geminio charm on his answer sheet and duplicated it into several copies and passed them around the class with a few flicks of his wand. A few minutes later, snickers could be heard throughout the classroom. Terry Boot actually fell off his seat after laughing so hard. Lockhart seemed to not notice as he was looking at a mirror at the other end of class.

After a few minutes, Lockhart collected them and rifled through them in front of the class. "Tut, tut - hardly any of you is lilac. I say so in Year with the Yeti. And a few of you need to -" he stopped midway, his face red.