A dumb suggestion from my friend says that there's a foolproof method to know whether you like someone romantically or not. It's simple. All you have to do is close your eyes, think of that person, and imagine kissing them. Kapag nandiri ka, e di hi...
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032824 #BYLAMwp Chapter 23
"Are you okay na with that?"
I blink. With what?
"Yes," I reply, because does my answer really matter? And knowing myself, I would not be able to decide immediately. The answer is needed now, or within, give or take, a year. The world would not pause to accommodate my indecisiveness. It never waits for anyone.
"So, October?" Mommy asks. Niladlad niya ang dress na hawak niya. It's printed in different abstract shapes of bright orange, pastel yellow, and green. "Bagay sa 'yo 'to! Iwan ko?"
Now, for that, I'm sure of what I think. "No." She frowns at the grimace I was not able to hide quickly. Why would she even ask that? Sharing clothes is not something we do.
"Ano pong meron sa October?" I can't even remember the last thing she said that my mind was able to digest.
It turns out that Mommy has a lot of things. Since we do not really rummage through each other's stuff, ngayon ko lang nalaman habang tinutulungan ko siyang mag-clear up ng room niya. I think I got so engrossed in her old photo albums that none of what she had been saying for the past half hour made it halfway through my ears.
Umalis ako sa pagkaka-Indian sit sa sahig para ilipat yung bistidang sinabi ko na sa kaniyang di ko gusto from the keep box to the donate one. She makes a disappointed sound that I ignore. I am not wearing that dress.
She picks it up again. "Why? Bagay nga sa 'yo 'to! Masikip na kasi 'to sa 'kin kaya hindi ko maisusuot. Sobrang tagal na nito e."
I sigh. That's true for half of her closet. Yung mga damit na hindi niya puwedeng isuot sa clinic or sa ospital, at napaglumaan na lang, itinatabi niya pa kasi. Now that she's so close to leaving and couldn't bring them all with her, ayaw niya pang pakawalan. Sayang lang sa space. She would start a new wardrobe in Spain, anyway.
I sit on the floor and find where I left off on the photo album. "No."
"Julianne."
God, I hate that name. "No."
"Puro itim yung nasa aparador mo! Para magkakulay naman." She returns the dress on the keep box. Ugh. Tinatamad na akong tumayo so I tried to scoot closer to the box just to get that abomination masking as a dress out of it but she pulls it away from me. "I-try mo lang! Sayang yung damit."
"Fine." I will not be wearing that. Pero if it keeps her quiet just to have that collect cobwebs on my closet, then okay. That's not too much to ask from me. Maluwag din naman ang aparador ko dahil nakakatamad bumiling damit.
Mommy laughs. She reaches for the top of my head and ruffles my hair. "Hay naku, Julianne. May boyfriend ka na ba?"
What? Saan niya dinampot yung tanong 'yun? "Wala."
