(Beca's POV)
I sat in the living room of my dad and step-monster Sheila's house, staring awkwardly at my father. "So Beca, what did you want to see me about?"
"I... Uhhh... You like Jesse right?" I asked
My dad chuckled "Of course. Why? He didn't ask you to marry him did he?" I stared at him for a while. "He did? When is the wedding, Becs that's great!"
"No-no, no he didn't ask me to marry him, there is no wedding." I shook my head. "I want to break up with him. I'm just not happy with him, but I know you like him a lot, and I don't want you to be angry with me again."
"Beca, who you date is your decision. Sure I like Jesse, but if you're unhappy then don't date him." My dad shrugged.
"Wait... so I can date-"
"Whoever you want. As long as HE treats you well and HE makes you happy." Dad put way to much emphasis on the 'he' in order to say 'don't date a girl you unholy disgrace to God!'
"But... what if she treats me just as well as any guy would, makes me extremely happy, and is an amazing person." I swallowed the lump in my throat and waited for his response.
"Beca I think it's time you left. You know how I feel about your urges to be with women, and before I get really angry I suggest you leave and think about what you just said to me." My dad looked furious. I felt my heart break, I stood up and headed for the door. "Don't you dare come back here if you have lived in sin, do you hear me Beca?"
"Yes dad." I left the house and got in my car, tears streaming down my face, I had my music blare as I drove back to Barden.
My tears were making my vision blurry, but I could still generally see where I was going. Titanium came on the radio, which only made me cry more. Chloe and I could never be. After my mom left, my dad is all I have. I can't lose him like I lost my mother. No matter how much I hate him, he is all I have left of my mom.
*Flashback*
"Beca! Get in here, now!" My dad yelled up the stairs. I ran down and stood in front of him, confused. "Beca, Mrs. Turner called me and said that she caught you and Julie kissing in her bedroom. You know that's sin!" I didn't know what to do, I just looked at him, tears welling up in my eyes. "You're fourteen now, haven't you learned anything yet?" My dad shook his head, he raised his hand and I closed my eyes, ready for what was coming. The back of his hand struck my cheek, with a loud clap, the ring on his finger will cause a bruise I'm sure. "You're such a disgrace."
*End of flashback*
I pulled into Barden University and headed toward my dorm. It was nearly 7pm so everyone is generally in their rooms or at a party.
When I opened my dorm I expected to see Kimmy-Jin, but instead I found Jesse and Chloe sitting on my bed. My heart began beating faster, and I started getting angry. Angry at Jesse, at my dad, at Chloe, but mainly angry at myself. "What the fuck are you guys doing here?" I spoke harshly.
"Woah, Becs... we were just going to... never mind. What's wrong?" Jesse asked. "What happened?" He got up and pulled me into his arms. He started rubbing my back, and kissed my temple. I looked at Chloe and saw the way she was staring at us. This was killing her inside.
"Nothing... just... my dad. He's mad at me about my grades in Russian Lit." I lied. "He can't accept a C, which is bullshit."
"Hey, you have other things to worry about, okay? Don't let this throw you off." Jesse tried to comfort me, and surprisingly... he was. Already I've stopped crying, I wasn't angry anymore, and I could feel my heart rate slowing. I looked at him, and for the first time I saw the way he looks at me. The look my friends have told me about too often. It was the same way I look at Chloe.
Jesse cupped my cheek and pulled me in, our lips pressed together and that was the first time I ever felt something when we kissed. I kissed him back, nearly forgetting the Chloe was sitting right there.
Maybe my dad was right. Maybe I need to just open myself up to Jesse, and things will be better. Maybe I can be straight.
Our kiss broke and Chloe got up. "I'm just gonna... I'm just gonna go." Chloe hurried out of the dorm and I didn't try to stop her.
I came to my senses and released myself from Jesse's grasp. I sat on my bed, where he sat next to me, placing his arm around my waist. "Why were you and Chloe in here?" I asked.
"Well, we know you don't like surprises so, we wanted to make sure it was okay with you that we through you a birthday party. Your birthday is in three weeks, we wanted to have a little celebration." Jesse smiled.
"Um. Yeah sure, why not?" I usually would have protested this kind of thing, but if my dad wants me to be more social, then parties are as social as it gets, right?
I leaned my head on Jesse's shoulder, and I could tell he was enjoying this new affectionate side I was showing. This side I've only ever shown to Chloe. Jesse pulled me in for a kiss again, his hand went into my hair, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, willingly straddling his lap this time.
Jesse was really soft and sweet when he kissed. He held me so close, I felt protected and safe in his arms. He tasted like popcorn, which made me laugh inside. I like the taste of popcorn, but it's nothing compared to the taste of stawberries that comes from Chloe's rough and passionate kisses. The way she bites my lip, and sucks on my neck, or how she squeezes my ass. Just the thought made me crave her, and suddenly Jesse wasn't as satisfying as he was before.
I broke our kiss and looked Jesse straight in the eye. "I... have to tell you something."
"What's that?" He asked, still in a trance from our makeout session.
I sighed and slid off of his lap "I like Chloe. As more than a friend." Jesse looked down. "I like you too, it's just that... I like Chloe, a lot." I felt bad saying this but I couldn't keep it in anymore. "My dad is really homophobic and he likes you, so I stayed. But I... I can't do this to Chloe anymore. I can't do this to myself."
Jesse nodded. "I know."
