DISCONNECTED

Lemonade.

1 week later...

HOUSTON/ TX

Bey Pov

You can taste the dishonesty
It's all over your breath
As you pass it off so cavalier
But even that's a test
Constantly aware of it all
My lonely ear
Pressed against the walls of your world
Pray to catch you whispering
I pray you catch me listening
I'm praying to catch you whispering
I pray you catch me
I'm praying to catch you whispering
I pray you catch me listening
I pray you catch me
Nothing else ever seems to hurt
Like the smile on your face
When it's only in my memory
It don't hit me quite the same
Maybe it's a cause for concern
But I'm not at ease
Keeping my head to the curb
Pray to catch you whispering
I pray you catch me listening
I pray to catch you whispering (whisper, whisper)
I pray you catch me (whisper, whisper)
I pray you catch me
I pray you catch me (praying)
I'm praying you catch me
What are you doin' my love?

I wiped my tears as I finished singing the lyrics I wrote. I'm a mess. This thing with Jay, Megan not speaking to me, I'm an emotional wreck. I'm so emotional I went back to Houston to help myself heal so I could properly get back with Megan if that's even possible now.

She's found her a new man from what I've seen. His name is Pardi or whatever. I don't know if there together but they've been all up on each other like they are.

It hurt me to see that but I deserve it. All I've caused her was hurt but I want her to be happy but I want her happy with me and it sounds selfish but that's how I feel.

I'm no longer staying with Megan because I wanted to stop myself from being tempted.

I've been staying with my mother in Houston and she talked to me about the whole situation.

"Beyoncé you've caused that girl so much hurt and pain. Megan deserves the up most love and you've done nothing but stomp all on that girls heart. I told you I didn't like Shawn from the jump but I let you do what you wanted. Beyoncé as your mother I am completely disappointed in you. Megan gave you her love and you ran away from it, you pushed her away and all of this is on you now."

My mom made sure I heard the truth and I agree with everything she said. I hurt her and now she wants nothing to do with me.

My sister was even disappointed in me.

"Beyoncé why would you do her like that? Megan was such a good person to you even after her mistakes. That girl gave you all her love and you stomped on her heart and I don't blame her for not wanting to be with you anymore. If you want her back you need to work for it in a non sexual way."

I just wish I could go back and fix everything.

I need to heal first...

LA/ LOS ANGELES

Megan Pov

"Move Pardi!" I yelled playfully as we were play fighting. Me and Pardi met at a party. No pun intended.

He's really cool and we're actually good friends. I lowkey like him a little bit.

He picked up and had me dangling over his shoulder. "Pardi put me down!" I yelled kicking and screaming. 4oe ran up and started jumping and barking on him.

"Yea get 'em 4oe!" I cheered and Pardi roughly but softly slammed me on the bed. I began hitting him in the back softly but making sure he felt my hits.