There are some words that we simply choose to keep to ourselves, and when they overflow, we have no choice but to allow them.
This compilation of my personal realizations may reflect yours. I decided to express them in words for myself, you, and us.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
We hold onto people because we hope for a change.
Most of the time, we keep these people in our lives because we are scared of the probability that when we lose them, we might regret it in the end.
Lately, I have been thinking of the reasons why I still choose to keep these people who hurt me when, in fact, I have a choice to let go of them.
Honestly, I did not get a clear answer from staying up late and internalizing it, but I came to realize that one thing that makes me keep these people in my life is the love that I have for them.
I also realized that I have no definite time to spend in this lifetime, and I would rather choose to keep the pain inside me if that means I am able to live with it, especially when I know that getting hurt means getting the happiness that I also need.
I came to realize that I don't mind the pain that they cause me; all I know is the relief that I get from them when they are around. The contentment of just seeing them happy. It is an unexplainable feeling when I see them thrive and live the life they truly deserve. The fact that you're there, witnessing all the joys that they cherish.
People might say that it sounds selfless and self-excruciating, but for me, it does not.
All people are meant to hurt you in all ways possible, but when you know that it is in a way that they are not aware of and have no control over but you, that is an exception.
It is you weighing what's most heavy, and that is the love and care you have for these people.
