De next day durin' mail call, Brer Chad hold up an envelope an' say, "A letter for Burt Ward!"
Brer Burt stand up wit a smile on 'is face. "Holy return to sender! For me?"
"How's it feel ter get mail?" say Brer Fox.
"It feels swell!" sez Brer Burt sezee. "It's from a girl in Gotham City who saw me coming out of the Batcave. Her name is Adele."
"Adele? A name with German origins just like the name Burt. Oh, bravo!" cheer Brer Chad.
"I can't wait to write back to her" say Brer Burt amorously.
"Write back right now!" sez Brer Fox sezee. "An' wen yo reddy ter mail it, Brer Chad's got a whole bunch o' stamps just lyin' around."
Brer Chad, he pull de fox ter de side an' whispa. "Those stamps are collectors items. You can't use them."
"Since we ain't mailin' it, ya don't need a stamp. Jus' read it an' write back" Brer Fox whispa back.
"Fine fine fine" say Brer Chad.
Meanwhile, at his home in de Briar Patch, Brer Rabbit hop up ter Brer Jeremy who was sulkin' by de front door.
"Brer Jeremy, Brer Jeremy! Great news!" say Brer Rabbit.
"Did Patty calm down?" Brer Jeremy ask wit hope.
"Oh no. No no no no no" Brer Rabbit shudda.
"Oh dear" sigh Brer Jeremy.
"De news is you gon' be a big hit! An' I just ordered me a thousand rolls o' Jeremy Clyde toilet paypa" say Brer Rabbit.
"Why would you do that?" say Brer Jeremy.
"Cuz ev'rybody likes celebr'ties an' ev'rybody uses toilet paypa. Myself, I uses two-play Julie Newmah" say Brer Rabbit.
"That's great, Brer Rabbit. But I'm too upset about Patty to make your film" say Brer Jeremy.
"Well, I's heeah fo ya f'ya wanna talk" say Brer Rabbit.
"I don't come from a family that talks a lot about their emotions" sez Brer Jeremy sezee. "I'm royal. My mother would show me she loved me by whipping a peasant."
"Well, don't try dat wit Sis Patty" say Brer Rabbit.
"I just don't know what I'm going to do" Brer Jeremy whispa.
"Well, all I know is I gon' need a lot mo munny ter sell dis toilet paypa" say Brer Rabbit.
Sis Patty, she cum out holdin' a bill. "Brer Rabbit! Would you please tell me why I have a hundred bucks worth of toilet paper on my credit card?"
"Nope!" Brer Rabbit snap.
YOU ARE READING
Jelly Side Up! (Uncle Remus style)
FanfictionTo celebrate the one-year anniversary of my Youtube movie "Jelly Side Up!", I've decided to re-write the story in the style of an actual Uncle Remus story.
